The World is Still the Same

A New Year and a New Video

2011-01-14T13:41:00.003-06:00

~Until Then*

*My goodness, that's an attractive opening pose.

The Big Move

2010-07-23T09:36:00.002-05:00

Between work and being tired, blogging has still been on my mind. I usually just send some mental vibes to here, but they never seem to post...

After finishing up work this past week, I'm back home in WDM for one last weekend before I move on Monday. It's just nice to be somewhere that isn't filled with boxes and goodbyes. I've been coming back about every 2 weeks so it feels like I've spent a good part of my last summer in Iowa at home. It's hard to believe that I've called this state home for 2 decades now, and in 72 hours, I'll be leaving this all behind. Part of me is very excited for the move and to start a new life, and part of me is apprehensive. It's going to be a huge culture change and I don't have any friends down there like I did when I went to Iowa. At least I have Darin and my dad, so that will help.

I've been saying goodbyes for months now and the hardest was to say goodbye to Paperback Rhino. They became my friends and probably the main reason why I would have stayed at Iowa. They are the best group of people I could ever surround myself with. I love each and every one of them, and was honored to be a part of the group as long as I could. It's hard when saying goodbye because I don't when or even if I'll see any of my friends again. That's a lot to swallow.

As a few of you know, I had to locate a new home for my cat, Espresso. She doesn't get along with Daisy and she just gets stressed out. In August she will be moving in with Joe and Vanessa of PbR in Iowa City. Choosing to give her up was the hardest decision I've ever had to make. But she was my cat, as where Daisy belongs to both Darin and I.

Darin and I leave on Monday evening to drive to Georgia and start our new life. I just hope that it works out and I'm not moving into a huge mistake. But the longer warmer weather and geographical features of the south are a huge plus. It's weird to think that I could be living there for 10 years- a whole decade yet to come.

I hope every one's summers are going well and know that I will miss you all very much, even if we are spread out all over the Midwest. Iowa will always be my home but it's time to start a new chapter in my life.

~Until Then

PS- I'll try not to come back over break with an accent.

A Most Excellent Weekend

2010-03-31T18:17:00.004-05:00

So as most of you know, last week there was a mime show. For many of the readers of this blog, (in fact I think all of them), coming back and supporting the show as an alumni is almost as much fun as actually being in the show, without all the work. This is the last show for me that not only do I lose 90% of all connections to people in it, but it was also the last possible year for me to see. I don't think I'll be coming up from Georgia to come see a mime show (sorry.) This year, the people that were apprentices my senior year we're finally graduating and so it was important to me to come and support them.

When you go to a mime show, it's so much more than just sitting and watching a show for an hour. It's a clusterfuck of everything that rocks in this world. People of all generations come to watch the show, (when I was at HuHot that afternoon, there was a woman who recognized my logo on my shirt and asked if I was a member. I told her that I worked for the crew and was back in town as an alumni. She told me that she was a mime 20 years ago. How cool was that?) and if you're not a student at VHS any more, you get to reconnect with people whom you probably haven't seen since graduation. It's great! I managed to get into town earlier enough that day, that I was able to hang out with the techies before they went out to dinner. Things have changed since my time in the booth, but overall it's relatively the same. As tradition, we always go out to Monterrey's and be as loud, obnoxious, and unsafe as possible while in a motor vehicle. There were ~16 of us at dinner, and on the way home I had 11 people (including myself) riding in my car. I do believe that's a new record.

After we got back to Valley, things kind of wind down and people do their own things. The mimes are busy getting ready and the techies start milling around back stage, the seniors being more quiet than I remember them in the past. We'd played heart beat, and I inserted my domination in both rounds. It was great to be back. Two years ago, before I graduated, I bought a book that I meant to start writing in to pass down to the techies still there, finally I got to write in it, along with Kyle, and Emmy. Two years ago, I probably would have been more gushy and sentimental, but I think this is a more edited version.

Cue the dance party! Thirty minutes prior to the start of the actual show, is when the house opens and the music booms. I had so much pent up energy from just waiting for this show for over a year, that I was just off the walls! I felt like my old self again. Feeling like that was amazing, if only for a night. People trickled in and mass orgies of reunions happened. I recognized most of the alums, but really only talked to a few that I haven't reconnected with in a long time. The show overall was fairly solid, a few mistakes here and there, but a great show. Hung around until most of the people had left before finally going home. I had a great time and am glad the last show I saw made me feel alive again.

On Saturday I had coffee and eventually dinner with a former teacher of mine from elementary school. My art teacher, Mr. Whitehead, was the first most influential teacher I've ever had. Maybe it's because he was my teacher for 6 years in a row and he's known me since I was 6 and we still talk to this day. I don't know. Last year as a freshman, I sent out letters to a few of my teachers that I had when I was growing up, and he was one of the few that responded and kept on responding to my letters. We've sent about a dozen or so letters each, and it's kind of a distant therapy. You don't have to meet face to face and there is enough of an age gap to where you can just let the other person's problems just vent out without making them your burden as well. It's a nice thing. He's just as stressed as I am at times. In a way, it's also like a story that you have to wait sometimes as long as month to continue it, but in the mean time you can go back and piece it together from former letters. I like writing, and this means more that just writing to a pen pal that you've never met and probably will never meet, (although I'd like to try that sometime I guess.)

When you are no longer a student of a particular teacher, and out of the grade school system, the relationship changes. There's not the restrictions of what you can and can't talk about as there were when you were a student. We swapped stories of getting in trouble, and finding out our limits when it comes to alcohol, and other ups and downs of life in general. It's also interesting, because he remembers more about me, than I do of him. He's like the grandparent I never had, and there's the same value of that kind of relationship, as there is with this one. It's amazing that 4 1/2 hours go by so quickly when you're constantly talking and swapping stories.
There's one hurdle that I will probably never be able to overcome, and that's how I address him. I don't think once during our conversation, I actually addressed him directly. He was at the coffee shop before me so I didn't have to say anything. In his letters he always signs as his first name, Tom. When I respond, I call him Mr. Whitehead. That's just what I've known him as for 13 years. When I got to high school, I dropped the prefix on most of my teachers names, especially the ones that I became very close with. Sometimes, I would even shorten their names to just one syllable if it worked. I feel as if that's even more informal than calling teachers by their first names as most of us do in college. I don't know, he just always going to Mr. Whitehead. I've always had a close relationship with teachers, and maybe that's why my desire to become one is so strong.

It was an incredible weekend filled with some great memories, and I don't think that there are many that can come close in comparison.

~Until Then

It's like a really ugly $7000 hooker bot.

2010-02-01T10:27:00.003-06:00

I think Bender would be appalled at Douglas Hines' latest unveiling of the newest craze in sex without a real woman. Sure, it can carry on a conversation with you and respond to your touch, and it probably doesn't have any built-in STI's, but still. a $7,000 pleasure device? I hope these men don't have any kids, and if they do, I hope they don't want them to start calling Roxxxy, Mom. What is the world coming to?

~Until Then

What kind of city is Iowa City when...

2009-11-19T11:30:00.002-06:00

All the bicycles are locked up but the unicycles aren't?
Girls wear shorts and a winter coat?
There are more bars than any other type of businesses?
The best recycling program we have are the homeless people?
Pedestrians delegate traffic patterns?
It's not possible to make some classes in the 10 minute period even while running?
It costs $40,000 to heat a building that will probably never be used again?

Just some food for thought.

~Until Then

Thought

2009-10-12T08:46:00.003-05:00

Did you ever find it strange how when we were in grade school and even a little bit now in college, how students who were in higher grades than you seemed so much (I know ironic) older and wiser? I mean way older and wiser? Then when you finally get to that same grade, you don't feel nearly as old, wise, or awesome as they did. Think back to when we were all freshman/sophomores- Fox, Harms, Eric, Salem? Didn't they seem way older than 17 or 18? They did to me. They felt like adults. Then when I turned 17 and 18, I didn't feel that at all. How is that? I don't notice it so much in college anymore. They were only teenagers and we pretty much thought of them as gods. It's just a thought, or maybe it's just me.

Stay warm everyone.

~Until Then

Acceptance

2009-09-29T08:10:00.003-05:00

I got in to Brenau about 2 weeks ago. I'm not making any decisions until I visit the campus next month. I'm slowly hating Iowa City more and more, and the majority of people around me. I'm not sure if my job and PbR are enough to keep me here. There's so much that's drawing me to Georgia. Last night Darin's mom called and gave a heartbreaking speech about how she wants us to stay close, but understands that there aren't exactly the best opportunities in Iowa. I still haven't even told my grandparents that I applied or toying with the idea of leaving. I have a feeling my grandma is going to disown me when I do tell her. I don't really see any of my WDM friends so that's not what's keeping me here. I have a feeling I'm going to leave, I'm excited and nervous. I told Darin that I'm just going to flip a coin. He told me that's a good idea, because even if it lands on the side that you think you want, you're going to flip again until you land on the side that you actually want.

Over labor day I had to go home and pack up my dad's house. It was hard and I was crying all of Friday night. Our whole house had to be repainted, and I've seen pictures on Iowarealty, but I refuse to go back in the house. My mom is going to go over and get the last of my things. We ended up throwing so many things away, that we just couldn't justify taking with us. Sure some of the things I have in boxes probably won't see daylight again for 10 years, but the fact that I know that it's there somewhere and I can go back to it is more than enough for me. Obviously my dad and I want the house to sell quickly, but for different reasons. His is money, mine is to just get it over with like a band-aid. Espresso is living with Darin and I, and so we'll see how Darin's allergies take to her over the winter once everything is all shut up. Hope to see some of you guys over breaks, hope all is well.

~Until Then

~Until Then

Damn the State Fair

2009-08-14T12:07:00.004-05:00

~Until Then

My Reasons

2009-07-12T21:26:00.003-05:00

This is a tad of an emotional post.

So my dad is selling our house. We've talked about it for a couple of months and it's kind of a tough subject. I've never really moved. I lived in my mom's house as a kid, but my dad's house is my house. I've basically customized that entire basement. Sure my mom's house is there, but after I moved out in 8th grade, she has since redone every room in the house. I didn't really realize how big of an attachment I have to that town home. Once my dad sells the house, I essentially don't have a home anymore. It's one thing to come home to a house that your dad owns, but doesn't live in anymore, but it's another thing to not have a home at all. I still feel like I'm too young for that. I hate sleeping there by myself, and unless Darin comes with me, I stay at my mom's. I told my dad that he could sell it when I was in Georgia, and I was in tears by the end of the whole conversation.

This weekend Darin and I were cleaning out my room. We're taking most of my bedroom furniture to Iowa City and we were cleaning out the storage bins under my bed. I came across a box full of old birthday cards from when I was 7 and then from every year on. There were cards from friends and family. Now, I tend to keep almost every handwritten letter, card, or anything personal that was written and given to me. I've got several boxes that sit on a shelf 364 days out of the year, but I open them once a year or so and look through them, just for laughs or sentimental value. I had forgotten that I had these cards, since they were shoved way under my bed. I was flipping through some birthday cards and there was a card that said "To our daughter.." or something like that, and I opened it up and it said its cute little message and then "Love Mom and Dad." I completely lost it. I think finding those cards, paired with moving things out of my room that will never go back in there, and selling the house that I love just was a bit too much. Sure I'm okay with my parent's divorce and I love the people that they're seeing. My parents are happy! But seeing those cards that I got as a 7 year old me was really bizarre. How was I supposed to know what was to come in the future? I'm tearing up constantly as I write this post.

I don't think I'm ready to grow up this soon. I want to hold on to parts of the past. I want to be a kid again. In a year and a half my world was turned upside down without any kind of warning.

~Until Then

My car met it's match.

2009-06-30T08:03:00.004-05:00

So I have a off road rated vehicle. We were in Fairfield yesterday and decided to test it out on a Level B road. As you can see it didn't work out too well.

My dad said even if I was driving a sedan, I still would have been stuck in the mud. At least it happened in Fairfield where there is your friendly neighborhood tractor, and not your West Des Moines $80 dollar fee tow truck.

~Until Then

Isn't it funny when you meet someone you know in a sex shop?

2009-06-28T19:50:00.002-05:00

I do not believe that Michael Jackson is dead. I think it is a hoax. He's one of those people that was probably going to find some way to live forever. His music was great and his dance moves are legend, but him as a person I'd rather not think about.

However, I am sad to hear that Billy Mays died. He was a great man, someone to truly aspire to become one day.

PS- I bought a bag that has a cover from a 2005 issue of Rolling Stone Magazine and it was about the same time that Jackson was going to go to trial and there was a sub title about MJ trial and defense strategies. I'm not sure if that makes the bag slightly more awesome or more depressing, but it's not the reason I bought it. In fact I didn't realize it was on there until after I had bought it.

~Until Then

One Hour of Hell

2009-06-23T08:12:00.003-05:00

This weekend Darin and I went to Georgia to go rafting for Father's day weekend. We left Friday afternoon, and we almost didn't make our flight even though we left Iowa City to get to Moline in plenty of time. Darin's '80 BMW has some problems. There is something wrong in the wiring that won't allow his battery to hold much of a charge, but this is usually fixed by plugging in the battery or getting the engine up over 55mph for over an hour. Well something happened when we went to Hannibal, MO 2 weekends ago, and it just won't hold a charge at all. So now when we want to get the bike started, we have to find a hill and roll start the bike. It's a pain in the ass, so for the past week the bike has just sat in the parking lot.

So on Friday we managed to get the bike started and took off towards the airport. We took the motorcycle with us because we were going to get it looked at and get some work done to it before we left. (The dealer is in Rock Island) About 2 miles from the Mississippi on the Iowa side, Darin pulled over (I was driving the Jeep) and he had me switch his bike off of reserve which would give him about 30 more miles. Plenty of time for us to get the bike to the BMW dealer. We hit the road again and not 2 minutes later he pulls off on the side of the road and the bike has died because it ran out of gas. Darin pushed the bike back up to the nearest on ramp and parked the bike while I turned around and went to go find a gas station. I pulled off on the same exit that he was and went looking. Ten minutes later I found one. I spent 10 dollars buying a gas tank and then spent another 10 minutes trying to figure out how to put it together. While all this is going on, I'm on the phone with my dad, his parents, and the dealership to see if they have a trailer to come get us, and of course this is the one day a week that there is no trailer. Go figure. I get it filled and go find Darin. As I pull up to him, there's a guy in a truck who has pulled over to help us roll start it on the flat ramp (the guy is a BMW owner as well). We get the bike filled and roll started, and finally all is looking well. I get in the Jeep and follow Darin on the ramp. He pulls off again on the side of the road, and waves me own, or so I thought. I drive another 50 feet or so and look back and he's still on the side of the road. I stop the car, get out, and run towards him. He starts running away from the bike back down the on ramp. The man is keeping the bike reved so it won't die on us. Darin has lost his glasses. He wasn't wearing his normal glasses for the bike, and apparently when he turned back to see if there was anyone merging, his glasses flew off his face. So Darin and I are on the side of the road looking for his glasses. He's no use without his glasses, so it's up to me. Darin tells the guy to just leave the bike because we have to get to the airport in 20 minutes. Oh and now it's starting to sprinkle. We keep looking for another 5 minutes or so, and finally decide to call it off. As we cross the road, I run across his glasses! Darin gets back on the bike and we decide to give it one last try. I push the bike down the shoulder and it starts! Great we still have to time to get to the airport! Darin takes off on the bike and I make my way back to the car. Now I wished the story ended here, but it doesn't. Not one minutes after I was back on the road, it starts pouring. A few miles later, I pull off on the exit and start to make my way towards the airport. While I'm driving, I get a call from Darin. He's lost, and I think that he took a wrong turn. I can't really understand him but I tell him to head back to the exit and try again. After I hang up with him, I see him driving past me in the wrong direction. Finally I get to the airport after calling him multiple times to turn around. I go inside and check our bags. The next thing I know, Darin shows up next to me soaking wet. He changes and then I lose him for another 10 minutes because I didn't know what bathroom he went to. We go through security and then ,of course, my purse gets pulled for inspection. We have 10 minutes to catch our flight. I'm in full out tears and frustration right now, and I think "What the hell is in my purse?" Then I remember that I have a pocket knife that I carry on my keys. I go over and fish the keys out of the purse. The guy asks if I just want to mail the whole thing back to me. Fine, whatever. We head to our get with 5 minutes to spare. I then remember that I have my multi tool in my purse as well. Oops. Then when we get to the gate, it starts raining sheets. You can't see five feet out of the windows. There was a rolling cart just past the window and it was gaining a lot of speed and crashed into something. There was an announcement saying that all passengers and personnel should step back from the windows, and the the power goes out. Luckily our plan was only late 30 minutes.

So the rest of my weekend went well, great rafting! I still took all of Monday off.

~Until Then

If you write a typo is that a writo?

2009-06-04T19:34:00.002-05:00

College? It's overrated. Too much money, too much work, way too much bullshit, but yet I signed up to do it again next year, and even this summer as well as working 40 hours a week. So much has happened in a month. I feel like my life has really transitioned. I'm paying rent, working 40 hours a week, just finished up the first of my two classes this summer, and still trying to fit in a little bit of a social life. What happened? I've only been out of high school for a year now.

This past semester sucked. I didn't enjoy any of my classes, and it took a beating on my GPA. All I can say is that I am glad Valley offered all of those easy college credit classes to counter balance my grades from this semester. This college shit it hard, especially if you know what you want to do, but don't know how to get there.

My first summer class was called "Drama in the Classroom." Sadly it was focused on using drama techniques in the elementary classroom. Over the course of three weeks, we had to teach two demo lessons. The first of the two lessons was a lesson that was already written for an elementary level classroom, and the second lesson we had to create for what ever context we wanted to teach in and it had to relate to a science, math, or social studies subject matter. My lesson that I did to day was about character development. I rocked the lesson! It was the first thing in a long time that really gave me a confidence booster and motivation to continue on with this whole teaching degree thing. Sadly I ended with a god damn B+ because I didn't do review in my first lesson and that brought me down a few points. I hate it when a class is only based off of about 100 or so points.

Next semester I'm applying to the college of education. There's about a 70% chance that I'll get in, and hopefully I'll be able to do my 10 hours of volunteering at Valley. The college of education is like an abyss or a black hole. I don't really know what happens in the college of ed. I'm pretty sure it's full of spys, because they don't like talking to you if you aren't actually in the college.

In May I did my first lessons for scuba diving. That was very challenging, rewarding, and frustrating all at the same time. It's a whole other world underwater, even just in a twelve foot deep pool. It's actually fairly easy to get used to breathing underwater and maneuvering around in the gear. The most dramatic moment was when I left the pool momentarily to go switch out my tank and I came back in and headed underwater. We were given some free time to practice our skills for our open water diver. A lot of the divers were working on hovering in the pool and fine tuning their buoyancy. I look out at the deep end and there are all these strange people in scuba gear just floating in the water. It was very creepy, they all looked dead. Darin and I do our certification dive later this month. I'm so excited.

So I've left Des Moines behind, I've moved to a new city have all new friends. I'm one year older, one year closer to doing what I want to. Is it worth it?

~Until Then

Red Without Blue

2009-04-24T07:28:00.002-05:00

If you have about 80 minutes to kill, I suggest you check out this link. It's an interesting documentary about twins when one decides to change his gender.

"I don't think of them as my children, I think of them as young people I know."

~Until Then

A quick update

2009-04-03T09:37:00.005-05:00

Today I woke up late and didn't have time to go eat breakfast, so Darin picked me up on the bike and we stopped at a gas station. I ran in and got a couple of donuts and drinks. As I was headed to class I thought to myself, "That bastard never gave me any change." Then I thought, "I never paid for any of this." I told Darin that we needed to turn around and go back. I felt terrible, and I can't believe that I actually forgot to pay for something. I went inside and told the guy what happened. Luckily he was laughing about it. He thought I had left the store with some napkins and didn't see that I had drinks in my hand. He told me that it happens more often than not, and that I was nice to actually come back and pay for them.

Also, for the past week I've secretly become a surrogate mother to two baby ducks. Purdy (the yellow one) and Percy (the brown one.) They've secretly been living in a bin in Darin's bathroom for the past week. Darin's mother's side of the family is huge (70+ people) and they have a Easter get together every year. Darin's family is in charge of providing entertainment for the great grand kids and they usually go to a farming store and get a handful of baby ducks and chicks for the day. The ducks and chicks then grow up on the farm that his family has. They're pretty much the most adorable things I've ever seen. It's almost like having children, except you can keep them in a box and you give them up after a week (we're taking them down to Fairfield later today.) They swim around in this 5 gallon bucket we have, and last night we let them swim in the bathtub.

Oh this summer, I will be in Iowa City. I think the Des Moines chapter of my life is pretty much done, so it's kind of weird to think about. I've grown up there my whole life, but now most of my friends are gone and my dad doesn't live there anymore. I'm getting an apartment next year, so if you're ever in town and need a place to stay let me know!

Also, plans are in the works of a motorcycle trip in August! Darin and I are going up to Canada and then making our way back down into Michigan to see my neices and then back down to Iowa City.

Hope all is well, and it was great seeing those of you last Thursday. Maybe I'll see you all again for "Grapes of Wrath" next month?

~Until Then

I Got Stuck

2009-02-18T17:45:00.003-06:00

Yesterday I got stuck in an elevator, I was only stuck for a few minutes, but I was the only one in the elevator. I'm not claustrophobic, but it definitely startled me for a bit.

I'm moving off campus next year, I'm really excited about it. It's only 2 blocks away from where I live now, and it's super cheap and also super awesome! I'm moving in with Darin, and I couldn't be happier or more excited for it.

I hate my classes this semester, they're killing me. They're no fun, not even my theatre classes. I feel like they all talk about the same thing. Why can't I just graduate and do the teaching myself. Can you home school college yourself? I don't know.

I'm not sure if I'm going to stick with my improv troupe. I've got a riff with one of the current captains. He's running it poorly but is being a jerk about it. He basically wants people to quit if they don't like how it's run. He want's the best quality show (which is understandable) but not if it drives a division between the group. First semester, there were 7 new people and we were told that all of us would be performing by the end of the semester, and that happened, but it was really shitty. The captains told us that we would be introduced over the course of three shows, because some of us were more stage ready than others. Well the first two people were introduced into a show right before Thanksgiving break, fine and dandy. Well now it's time to get more people in, but oh wait- the captains fucked up and one of the shows that they were going to bring people in was actually a special show where my group only got 30 minutes of stage time, so they didn't bring any new people in. So they ended up throwing the other five of us into the last show before winter break, and it was terrible.

Now we've come to this semester, and rehearsals are really shitty, but our one captain won't get his act together and unify the group. Our troupe is already exclusive because we hold auditions, but now with this whole "quality" issue, we're being divided into two other groups. I no longer have fun doing improv, and I hate going to rehearsals. I've become completely self conscious again, and I hate that. I feel like I'm being judged constantly, and that I (and a few other members) are secretly trying to be persuaded to quit. Fuck this.

So yea, All State is this weekend, and I'll see you all there if you're going.

~Until Then

Three words- Counter weight system!

2009-01-12T15:20:00.005-06:00

First off, happy New Years and a belated happy holiday season. I didn't really have anything worth writing about, beyond a sentence or two on Facebook. Before break, I was offered a job through the Division of Performing Arts at U of I. I work on the electrics crew doing generally the same stuff I was caught doing in the auditorium at VHS; but now I get paid (by the book) to do it. The only downside was that I had to cut my break two weeks short to come back to Iowa City and work 40 hours a week before classes started, but if I enjoyed doing it at Valley, then I didn't think I would mind doing it here. Also, there really isn't much left for me in Des Moines. My life has shifted to Iowa City, and I think that this is where I'm going to be this summer as well.

It's now been a week since I started the job, and I absolutely love it. My boss is like a way younger (but nearly as sarcastic) Mr. Borstad who swears just as much. I'm the youngest one on the crew, but that doesn't bother me. Everyone just seems to click and works well, as well as goofing around once and a while. Everyone just looks like a techie, acts like a techie, talks like a techie, etc, it's awesome! I don't work nights or weekends, unless I'm doing board op for one of the shows. Not only do I work in the theatre department, but I also work in the dance studio, and the occasional operas. Unfortuneatley, due to a large amount of water this summer, Voxman and Hancher are still inoperable, so the operas have been moved about througout the rest of campus or downtown Iowa City.

I still can't believe that I have this job, and probably won't believe it until I get my first pay check. I've got a job doing something that I love and am good at. I get paid to be techie and show up in grungy jeans and a sweatshirt. No one cares what you look like, there is no dress code, or formalities; just show up and do the work, and don't be a jerk about it. I can pick when I work and for how long I work as well.

I loved what I did at Valley, even though I would bitch about it a lot, I really enjoyed it. The concerts, plays, meetings, or whatever else needed technical assistance really fascinated me. The auditorium at Valley will always have a place in my heart, I know every knook and cranny of the place and didn't mind spending hour after hour there doing stuff. Now I'm here and I've got a whole new place to fall in love with. I've gone from one theatre to four theatres, Space Place- dance theatre in North Hall, Mabie theatre, Thayer theatre, and Theatre "B"- all in the Theatre Building. Each theatre is completely different in set up, and each has it's own system of complex cats and grid systems. I now have four booths to call home and chill out in. Also, these performing arts divisions have money. That means no more "A" frame ladders, we now have Genies for each space. No more "just grab what lights we do have", now it's "put the 50 extra lights up in the gallery", or "get 15 36 degree Source 4's and 23 26 degree Strands". We've got lights that cost 10 grand and gobos and gels like you wouldn't believe. Every show has a lighting designer, which means every show has a lighting plot which has to be put together in a specific order. We've got Master Electricians and a crew of 10+ people, not 3. I've got a black box theatre, 2 thrust stages- with one of them being a beautiful main stage with a huge show (4x the size of Valley's), and a proscenium stage with a beautiful dancer's floor. There's prop storage like you wouldn't believe, and it's all organized! The two things that I like most about this job, is A) we don't have to scramble for lights, headsets, boxes, or cabels and B) the counter weight system in Mabie with a 52' fly space. I've never worked with a fly space or a counter weight system. No more having to spend twenty minutes cranking down the electrics and 40 to crank it back up. No more having to get the entire BD and BDT together just to hoist the scrim back up to the batons. It takes one person, just one person. No more fraying ropes and impossibly heavy curtains. It's incredible!

I really do love my job and I'm so fortunate that I found it so soon. No more kitchens for me or depressing off campus jobs. I do what I love and what I'm good at. It's incredible.

~Until Then

PS- Who's going to be at Parent's Night on Friday?

Announcing the Engagement of Bruce Pichler and Robyn Hans

2008-11-25T06:27:00.003-06:00

October 17, 2009 will be the date of Bruce and Robyn's wedding in northern Georgia. The two of them have been together since October of 2007 and are happily in love with one another. Between them they have 7 children, but none of them will be living at home come next fall.

I can't believe that my dad is getting married! It's weird for me. Your parents are supposed to get married before you're born (in most cases.) I'm going to have a step mom whom I absolutely adore with two incredible step sisters to hang out with when I'm in Georgia. He told me last night, and was really nervous about my reaction. I flipped out! I told him I was wondering if it was going to happen and that I was really excited for him. He proposed to her up in Canada last month, after a few glasses of wine and a beautiful sunset. He just has to tell Alicia, but he's not sure how she's going to take, she'll probably be told when the two of us come back down here for Christmas.

Robyn is the best thing that has ever happened to him. He loves her with all of his heart, and I've never seen him happier. She's kicked his butt into shape and they enjoy going hiking, scuba diving, kayaking, rafting, and biking together all throughout the southern United States. I couldn't be happier for the two of them, I can't wait!

~Until Then

It takes me back

2008-11-10T20:46:00.002-06:00

So this past Saturday I went and watched a dress rehearsal of my sister's mime show at Indian Hills. As I was sitting there for about 20 min before it all started, I was thinking (something that I try to do on occasion) and realized that this is where it all started for me 5 years ago. Sure I did some theatre stuff in 7th grade, but it wasn't until 8th grade when it really took off. I met Joanna, Thomas, Jordan, Mary, and Brittany during mimes. These people I still consider to be some of my close friends. I felt awesome hanging out with all of you and just creating a show. You guys were the basis to my theatre foundation for the rest of my secondary education. I felt like I fit in with you all, and that's something that I never really found any where else before. I was excited to see my sister up on the same stage where I was only a few years prior wearing mime white, a leotard and pants, with the same boxes from way back when. I was exited, this is where the rest of her life starts. That moment for me, defined everything. I really hope she gets everything that she can out of what she does.

The skits were cute, not thought provoking at all. There were some skits that were similar to the show that I did for Silent Majority. Chaotic Classroom, Tug oh' War, and a few others that I can't really recall off the top of my head. It was weird being back at Indian Hills at 9 am on a Saturday morning. I miss those days, what a blast. I was so proud of her when she was done, I really hope that she sticks with theatre and finds her own place.

~Until Then

Back in WDM, but it no longer feels like home.

2008-11-08T11:26:00.004-06:00

I'm going to post on my SISTER's mime show later. I'm so proud of her.

~Until Then

I am not an Actress.

2008-11-06T18:03:00.003-06:00

I enjoy acting, but I am not an actress. I enjoy costume and makeup, but I am not an actress. I enjoy speaking with other characters on stage, but I am not an actress. I enjoy becoming part of a bigger picture, but I am not an actress. I enjoy taking a bow, but I am not an actress. I am not an actress, I am a mime. I am not an actress, I am an improver.

I do not care to think about the subtext, I am an improver. I don't enjoy searching for hidden motivation, I am a mime. I don't like having a secret objective, I am an improver. I don't enjoy being organic on stage, I am a mime. I am not an actress. I am out of the ordinary, I am physically expressive, not mentally expressive. I do not search for a deeper meaning, or think of the "what if's", I just do. I don't think about it. I act and speak without thinking. Thinking gives time for reaction for the audience. I don't want that. I am an improver and a mime. I am a physical presence, I am here to be seen and heard. I am not an actress. I never wanted or want to be an actress. I am a performer. I live in the now, not the past, not thinking about the future. Now. I am not an actress.

I perform. I am an improver. I am a mime. I am not an actress.

~Until Then

It's 6 months till I turn 19!

2008-11-02T15:57:00.002-06:00

This past week has been a whirlwind of fun and excitement. I don't even know how to untangle everything that's happened to me this week. I guess that I don't really want to. My mind is preoccupied with positive things, that I can't really focus on much else. Every minute, I find myself distracted from what I should really be doing. I need to be busy, this is really bad.

For the first time in a long time, I'm genuinely happy. No, I wasn't depressed or anything like that; I just didn't realize how happy I could be until this past week happened. I'm positive that this is where I'm supposed to be, and this what I should be doing. I can't really write anything, I don't know how to explain it anymore.

See you all Saturday, I'm so excited to meet up with everyone. :)

~Until Then

I should really invest in a helmet

2008-10-28T16:04:00.004-05:00

So I had yet another wonderful head injury while at practice for something in the theatre department. Something about my head and theatre just don't mix. I've hit my head during all three of my solo mime skits at some level of competition because I get really physical, I've run into stuff doing tech stuff while up on the cat walks and failing to notice where they put the new water pipes in, then there's the famous golf club incident, and there are probably a few others that I'm forgetting at the moment. Well, I can now ad an improv head injury to the list.

Sunday night I was at PBR practice and we were playing 185, but they call it 186 for some weird reason (Sorry Joe and Darin, I've always done it as 185) and I was jumping out to say something. The place in which we practice has tile floor, and before PBR got to practice, there was another group down there and somehow they had gotten parts of the floor wet. Well, so I jumped out onto the balls of my feet and the next thing I knew I was on my back and had smashed my head into the ground. I think this was worst head smash by far. It all happened in a split second, and when I sat up I saw blue stars. I also recently dyed my hair blue, I wonder if there was a correlation between my hair color and the color of the stars. Luckily, it was nearing the end of practice, so I just sat down at watched the last few minutes of 185 and worlds worst after everyone was doing asking if I was okay.

After practice, I noticed that my vision was going in and out of focus, so my friends walked me to the hospital and had my checked out by a doctor just in case. After about an hour of sitting, my vision became clear again and I was examined by the doctor. He told me that I was just going to have a very large goose egg, and some nasty headaches to deal with the next day, and to come back only if things got worse.

So two of the members from PBR take me home and stay with me until I fall asleep. The next day is filled with splitting agonizing headaches, but overall I'm fine. I stayed home Monday and Tuesday except for my last class today. My friend Darin stayed with me most of Monday to make sure I didn't injure myself further. Which needless to say, I managed to bang my head at least 2 or 3 more times. I'm still sore, and my neck is tense, but I think I'll pull through. I really think that I should get a helmet, or switch to a business major....NO! See you all in 2 weeks!

~Until Then

I officially feel like a college kid

2008-10-22T17:06:00.008-05:00

That's right. I do feel like I belong here now. Last night, and I guess early this morning, I finally did the last thing on my list t (not that I actually had a list) that now allows me to feel at home here. Last night I went to The Mill (it's the bar/restaurant where all the theatre kids go to hang out and also has a really cruddy dance floor in front of a raised stage) to listen to a band that two members of PBR are in. Kevin, is the leader of the band doing vocal and guitar, and Mike plays the wash board. That's right, the fucking washboard with a couple of spoons. The Mill hosts this music fest every Tuesday night and three bands play and it takes about 3 hours, somehow, I don't know how though but it did. The bathrooms in The Mill are a step above a porta potty. One of them didn't even exist, it was just a hole in the ground. Also the only working faucet out of three sinks was the cold faucet. About half of PBR was there to support Kevin and his band Broken Spokes which consists of 2 other guitarists (one does back up vocals), Kevin, Mike, a girl who plays the fiddle, and a guy who plays this. It rocked. My friends Paul, Darin, David, and myself got up to dance in the "mosh pit." They played a few covers including "Drunken Lullabies" by Flogging Molly and some others that I didn't recognize. They also had some of their own songs, with a notable favorite "Drinkin' Whiskey and Pissin' Beer." I walked home hoarse and on such an energy high.

So I've...
Slowly become a night owl, and hating myself for having an 8:30 class five days a week
Stayed up talking with another person for three hours about absolutely nothing
Found a drama family
Gone on a road trip with nothing but my toothbrush
Had cold pizza for breakfast for more than 3 days
Questioned the milk, then drank it anyways
Walked to my dorm barefoot
Taken a nap on Pentacrest
Skipped class to sleep in
Hung out and people watched
Gone to a bar concert
Hit up 4 or more coffee houses in one day
Taken multiple naps per day
Crammed onto the bus system with about 100 other people
Gotten lost on the West side of campus
Cursed under my breath while walking into the wind because it's so f'ing cold

~Until Then

I feel all grungy, I love it!

2008-10-19T18:46:00.002-05:00

This weekend my improv troupe went to the great world of Chicago for a night. We managed to see some free long form at the I.O last night. That's right, we've got the insider connections. It was a lot of fun to really see the base of long form improv and watch people who do what a lot of us want to do, perform improv for a living. There are 13 of us in the troupe, and we also met up with 3 former PBR members. I had forgotten how beautiful Chicago was, and I only wish that I was able to spend more time. We didn't get into Chicago until maybe 4 on Saturday and then left around 12ish. So a short trip, but full of bonding. To save expenses we stayed at one of the former member's apartment... a one bedroom one bathroom apartment. The current 13 members all stayed on the floor in the living room, lets just say we bonded in more ways that one can think. We got up the next morning, ate left over chicago style pizza, cupcakes, and beer for some of us. No one showered, a few of us (inclucding myself) didn't even change clothes while we were there. We left cramed into 3 cars and drove back.

It's hard to believe that I found a home here at Iowa City. I'm going to be working with these awesome people for the next 4 years. Just hanging out with them and playing I've never, truth and dare, and just talking was a blast. As much as I love these guys, I love showering and my own bed with no one else in a 5 foot diameter of me a little more.

~Until Then

Look out

2008-10-12T13:23:00.004-05:00

Indianola: 2 near death experiences in 3 hours

#1 I went down to Indianola to see my grandparents. My mother asked if I would drive since her car was full of equipment. On my way down, I was driving on 65/69 and I was about 40 or so feet behind a truck hauling farm materials. We go to drive up a hill when the something flies out of the back of the truck. It's a giant metal bin and lands in front of my about 20 feet away. There's a car behind me and a motorcycle to the left of me. I have no choice to swerve. Luckily I managed to keep control of my jeep and not hit anyone, but not even on ice have I ever swerved that badly before.

#2 We were pulling out of gas station in Indianola, and I stopped my car at the drive entrance and got out of my car because I saw that I had left my gas cap off. I get back in my car and proceed to pull out. Out of nowhere comes this girl on a bike and I hit her with the front bumper of my car. Not hard enough to knock her over, but strong enough to maker her stop and restart her bike ride. I freaked out and got out of my car and yelled if she was okay, but she kept on biking away. It was a good thing I was only just starting to move, it could have been so much worse. But what can I do if she didn't stop?

I don't want to go back to Iowa City.

~Until Then

Video Post??

2008-10-10T12:20:00.002-05:00

Wow, I look away alot. Hmmm. Sweet. Maybe next time I'll do something creative.

~Until Then

An experiment

2008-10-06T18:54:00.005-05:00

I decided that I would try to become a vegetarian for at least 30 days. I've always heard that the first month of vegetarianism is the most difficult. With all of the options that they serve at our dining halls, I figured that it would be fairly easy. It was. As the month progressed, I slowly became more and more sick of the food. My original thought that I would be able to maintain it because there were options, but those options really turned our to be pasta with marina sauce and grilled cheese. I began to miss real food, but I was determined to make it. I did, but I don't think I could be a vegetarian here because I can't make my own food because I'm bound to meal plans. I can't go out everyday and have a wide variety of food choices. I'm proud of myself for doing it, and I think that I'm going to only eat very limited meat choices here. Because some of the things that they have out are really gross looking and I've observed that 90 percent of our food here is frozen before they cook it. It was a fun experiment.

My performances were this weekend, and it went well. I played a production manager for a film. It was the first time I really felt connected to my character, and because of that, I was able to really devote myself to my character. My family came up, it was nice to see them all. The weekend went by in a flurry, but I enjoyed it. Now I have all this down time. That's why I love theatre. You work and work to no end for a week, and then as soon as the production is done, you have all this awesome free time and don't know what to do with it. I audition next week for the castings of the spring shows. I won't have any other performances this semester unless I get cast in a community theatre show, so I can devote myself to my improv troupe.

On a more personal note, I am single for the first time in 2 1/2 years. Nick came up this weekend and we had a mutual agreement that it wasn't working out. My priorities have been reshuffled and he's not on top of the stack. He realized that maybe we were going to same destination, but how we each got there was very different. We're still friends, legitimately. I care about him, but I care more about him being happy.

I bought myself an iPod touch today. I'm very excited to have it. It's sort of a pick me up, congrats on doing a show, and doing well in college present type thing. It's all shiny. I'm coming back this weekend, so if you're in town, give me a buzz.

~Until then

I Eat Breakfast Twice a Day 5 Days Out of the Week.

2008-09-22T20:44:00.006-05:00

I auditioned for a group called the Paperback Rhinos. They're the other improv group on campus besides 5th City Improv of which I am a member. I decided that I wanted to try to audition for the group to see if I would be accepted again for my talent after not really having auditioned for 3 years to get into an improv group. Let's face it. After freshman year, auditions were just a formality for the spring improv show. I auditioned with about 12 other people, and was unable to make the second night of auditions due to the fall nite o'mime. I was called back on Sunday to do more scene work and some long form stuff. There were 10 of us at call backs, from the 20 or so who auditioned I'm guessing. After call backs, they told us that we would know if we made it sometime between Sunday night and Monday night.

Cut to 1:30 in the morning. I've been asleep for a few hours now, and my roommate has just fallen asleep as well. All of the sudden loud banging occurs at our door. Both Emily and I bolt upright and stare at eachother, then the door, and the back to eachother. She asks if it's drunk people. We wait some more. The pounding gets louder. We wait again. Who's ever knocking is almost breaking down the door. I get out of my bed, trying not to hurt myself in the process. I creep over to the door and unlock it so I can peek out. I see 8 faces peeking back at me. "Fuck!" I yell. I shut the door and unlock it all the way and open it back up and stare at them. I'm half asleep and don't have my glasses. I'm a bit disorentated. "What the hell?" I ask.

"Hi Pichler." Joe Meyer says.

"Uhm, can I help you." I ask again.

"No, not really. But you can take this." Joe says. He hands me a piece of paper. I look at it. There is a picture of a baby in a rhino outfit.

"Really?" I say sort of excited.

"Really!" Joe says way too enthusiastically.

"You guys are psycho." My roommate yells from back inside my dorm.

"No, we're improvers" Joe yells back. "Okay, bye then." And then him and the rest of the improv troupe leave Currier. Katie (the girl across the hall pokes her head out of her room.) and gives me a look of 'WTF is going on at 1 in the fucking morning?' I jump up and down and say yay! Then I go back to bed.

*****
So I have a job on campus at the Hillcrest Market place doing various things depending on the day. Tuesdays I work in the salad room working and prepping fresh produce, Thursdays I'm in the bakery with Pat. She's like the grandma I never had and together we make cookies, cakes, pies, treat bars, etc except in mass amounts. Then Saturdays I work as cook's help in the morning then switch to whatever they need me to do in the afternoon. I really enjoy my job. Except lunch rush on game days. It's like the calm before a storm. It will be nice all morning, just a slow stream of people coming in to eat, then around 2 or so a flood of black and gold gushes into the Market Place. It's crazy! Constantly having to restock food and make sure that things stay clean. I can't tell you how many times I've been burned by reaching into the food warmer and having my arm touch the shelves. It's like playing operation in hell. It's all fun though.
*****
On a more serious note, in my acting class my teacher assigned us to do an action objective scene. It's hard to explain, but I'll do my best. Someone you care about is in a life or death situation. You have to save them, but there has to be a strong chance that you WILL fail. There is no acting or planned actions allowed. You have to come up with all the details to the back story of your scene, but cannot speak. It's all about being in the moment. Also, the scene has to take place in an environment that is familiar to you. All of us had to bring copious amounts of things from our dorm room and set up our space. Most of us set up a bed room space since that was the easiest.

My scene involved me trying to save Nick from putting a bullet through his head. He had been drinking at a party he through and had gotten drunk even though I made him promise me that he wouldn't. I call Nick and he flips shit. He thinks that I've found out that he's drunk and am going to break up with him or yell at him. He locks himself in his room with the gun that his brother bought him for safety since his apartment is in a rough neighborhood. His friends can't call the police because they're all underage and are drinking, and he is threatening to shoot himself they do. His friends call me and tell me to get back from Iowa City to Des Moines ASAP.

Now for the second half. My mother had bought me a small lock box to keep my personals in when they weren't in use. It has a 4 digit lock code, that I had never bothered to change from the factory setting (which was all randomized) because I forgot about it when I set it up. I wrote down the code on a small piece of paper and put it away safely amongst my personal items. Now I have to frantically search for it five weeks later. I don't remember where it is. It could be anywhere. I tear through my scene. In my space I have a box full of personal letters, a journal stuffed with pieces of paper and more letters, books upon books, and all of my school materials. I rip through everything. I'm getting more and more upset as time goes by. I have to get to Nick. I can't let him do this. But I can't find that paper with the code to the safe which has my car keys. I go through everything and fail to find it. I don't know what to do. In one last attempt I grab the lock box (which is attached my my chair by a cable which can only be undone by opening the box) and try to pry it open by messing with the combo. It's a less than great quailty box, and somehome I managed to pry it open. In shock I grab my keys and leave. That's how the scene went. It's hard to fully explain. But there were moments in my scene where I felt like I was going to be sick. I was crying and my hands were shaking. It was hard to concentrate on what I was doing. This excericse was incredible.

~Until Then

I may be a pirate

2008-09-07T08:57:00.001-05:00

But for those of us who have so many questions about surviving on campus. Enjoy.

~Until Then

Pepper spray and Soviet Jackoven-urface.

2008-09-05T11:08:00.004-05:00

I auditioned last week for all the fall shows and managed to land three callbacks- Hidden in this picture, Iron Hymen (the musical), and Sex with a Censor/Katie and Frank. Call backs we're nothing like those in Valley. I was only actually reading for 10 minutes or less and then I could leave. The director(s) didn't talk much to the call back-ers, and didn't say much after. I managed to to get cast as Ruby a production manager in Hidden in this picture. It's a one act, maybe shorter, directed by a graduate student. It's a 4 person cast about filming the last 11 minutes of a movie (similar sounding to Tropic Thunder) and there are cows standing in the field. I haven't read the script yet, but it sounds really great. I was really pleased that I got cast as a freshman.

I went to the Iron Hymen call back and that was about the most unusual experience in theatre I've ever had. There were five of us, and each person was given a character from the script to read, monologue style. The director picked out 5 or so lines from the script and the reader had to animate them. There was no actual dialogue in the call back. Also we had to sing happy birthday (however we wanted to interpret that) to a stick figure named Fred on a whiteboard. Fred wasn't having the best of birthdays, and we needed to cheer him up. Lets just say that there were some interesting renditions of Happy Birthday. Oh, before I forget, the parts to be cast in Iron Hymen include Skinny, Tubbers, Whorebot Lindsey, Queerbag McGee, and my favorite...Soviet Jackoven-urface. That's call backs at Iowa!

On a completely different note, last night at Dirty Burge (our dining hall on the East side) some douche bag decided that it would be awesome to spray pepper spray in the middle of the dining area. I was out to eat with 5 of my friends, and in about the last 5 minutes of my meal experience, I noticed that a lot of people behind me were coughing. I didn't really think much of it. Then my nose and throat felt irritated and I tried to suppress it, but I couldn't. I started to cough along with the entire dining hall. It wasn't a 'clearing your throat' cough, it was a "fuck shit I'm chocking' cough. I left the hall, and as soon as I cleared the barrier between the hall and the eating area I was fine. But I stayed for a few minutes talking with a few girls about what happened, and during so more and more people emerged from the exit with red eyes and they were coughing like mad. God, I love the people here.

~Until Then

One week down and what a week it was.

2008-08-29T13:24:00.003-05:00

Okay so technically I still have one more class to go before I can officially call it a week, but I've got another 2 hours of a total of 6 hours in between the two classes I have today. So I'm going to write this. It's been a blast. I don't think I'll have any hard classes this semester, which is awesome. I don't have any math, science, lecture, or discussions classes this semester. Two of my classes (which both just happen to be theatre classes) are hands on, so it give me a break from German and Rhetoric.
I auditioned for the fall shows last night. They group all of the auditions into one setting so all the directors are there and can pick and fight over who they want in their casts. Now, as most of you know, when ever I've auditioned in the past, it's with 1-3 people watching me, and they are about 100 feet away. Well since our lovely theatre building is still under flood repair, they've moved it to a classroom. I walk into the class room, not only am I 8 feet from the nearest director, but there are about 30 of them watching me. I get to choose my monologues for the first time, and you have to fill 3 minutes preferably with two contrasting monologues. I guess nerves helped, because when I was practicing, I was at three minutes or over. But with the adrenalin, I managed to spit out both in three minutes while still maintaining a good pace. I had them laughing with the comedic monologue, so I left the room on a great adrenaline confidence high. Now I just have to wait a week for the cast lists to go up.
It weird having all this ample time in between classes, instead of just 5 minutes. Normally I go back to my dorm and do homework so I can have evenings free. I also managed to land a job today. I work the the Hillcrest market place (cafeteria) and it's during the morning and/or afternoons so it won't ever conflict with theatre rehearsal, which is awesome. My schedule this semester is super bad ass. I think I can do this whole college thing after all.
Oh I guess my teachers are all right. My German teacher is really young and from England, so she has a crazy strange accent. She speaks only in German unless we don't know the word, so that really helps. She like a mix between Hansen and a small psychotic dog. My Acting teacher is a lesbian first off. That's like the 4th thing she told us in that class. She's very strict, but in a good way. She knows what she's talking about and is willing to help you, but only if you're wiling to work. But the class is only for theatre majors so that will really help. My theatre design class is taught by a temp unfortunately. I have a feeling this class will be a fluff class. But she seems nice, and has let us out super early so far this week. My rhetoric teacher is a grad student and has no clue as to why he's in the class. He's really quiet, and the class will probably walk all over him. Also it's taught in the basement of a majorly flood damaged but repaired building so it reeks of stagnant flood residue.
For those of you who care, Fall Nite is Sept. 18. I'm going back, but it'll be a one day round trip, so I won't have time to do much after the show. Hope to see you there.
~Until Then

Whatever the fuck comes out of your face.

2008-08-23T22:57:00.005-05:00

I had my first theatre experience today at Iowa. It wasn't through the university, but actually a part of a joint community theatre effort. It was All in a Day Theatre Festival. A team of 6 writers, 6 directors, and 12 actors were randomly selected and placed together, then given a genre and location for their scene. The writer had until 6 am this morning to write the script from the time they left the meeting the previous night. The actors then had less than 12 hours to rehearse, perfect, and perform the 10 minute scene. A lot harder than it sounds, but a total adventure to take part in.

I was teamed with Lauren (writer), Brian (director), and Kevin the other actor. Our scene was an abandoned mine shaft and our genre was horror. Perfect. I was very excited to start. Kevin was not at the first meeting, so I didn't get a chance to meet him until today. He was eye opening, but not in the way you would think. Kevin is probably in his 40's-50's. When I was around him, I was constantly uncomfortable, and experiencing the highest levels of anxiety I've ever felt. It's not that he was mean, rude, or disgusting. I just don't exactly know what it. He's a great actor, perfect for the role in the scene, but he's very quiet. If it hadn't been for my director (who didn't do much directing) I doubt we would have spoken a word. All day my heart was racing, and I felt like I was going to get sick several times during the day. A few times, I had to sit outside and collect myself. I felt terrible because I probably made Kevin feel awful. Never have I experienced what I felt today. Kevin would talk fine with our director. The only times I felt truly comfortable was when our writer was there. Unfortunately, she wasn't there until the afternoon.

The scene- a girl wakes up in a dark place and moves around stumbling about until the lights turn on. There is only room for to enter and exit, and no matter what door she takes, she will always end up in the same room. It isn't until a few minutes she runs into a man who has been down here for as long as he can remember. The girl asks him questions about why he's here, who put him here, what's he doing now, how did he get here. She doesn't find out much except that he's devoid of a normal human personality. His skin is very leathery, and he works for the devil basically. She starts to freak out because she cannot find a way out of this place. Soon, the guy starts to let out that he knows more than he's letting on. He knows what the girl did, why she's here and what's going to happen to her. The girl starts to flip and tries to run, only to be grabbed by the man and slammed to ground. During the entirety of the scene, the guy is messing with something in his pocket. He pulls it out and it's a knife. They girl asks him what he's going to do with it. He responds he's going to the same thing to me that I did. She tries to run again, only to be pushed back down and cut under her arm. She leaves the room and ends up on the other side. She's in pure panic. The guy grabs her by the throat and slowly leads her across the room saying how's she's arrogant. What was she expecting to see? A party for her? A celebration of her accomplishments? No. The guy stabs her in the leg and she slowly begins to die from massive bleeding. He tells her that she is dying for a second time, and there will be a third, fourth, thousandth time etc. and he will always be waiting there for her. Then she wakes up moments later and stumbles around looking for a light switch, and the whole process starts again. Sweet huh?

Kevin was perfect for this role. He was very intimidating, and there were points in the day were I was actually truly terrified of him. It wasn't acting then, it was trying to save my life. He would pull out this 6 inch knife and threaten my character with it. In the beginning of the day, we used a pen for prop blocking purposes, and later in the day we switched to a dull knife with some duct tape on the sharp edge. No on told me that we had switched the pen for a knife. So Kevin whoops out this huge knife only inches from my face and I was scared shitless. Also he stabbed my leg with it when we were blocking the struggle scenes. He didn't break skin, or even my jeans, but it left a good size bruise. He started tearing up. Apparently, some point earlier is his life, he stabbed himself in the leg with a knife and felt awful for even touching me with. I felt terrible, but I was scared.

The show went great. Packed house and great audience response. All the other scenes were funny and cute, then you get to ours. Starts out awkward, then gets pretty fucking serious. I don't think they knew how to respond to it. But it went well. Overall, good day. Great experience. I'm still working on bringing my anxiety level down. I don't know why I felt so stressed around him, but I did. It was very weird.

College is going well. Just hanging out with people, finding my classes, and getting to know my roommate.

~Until Then

Life as a college student day 1

2008-08-20T08:09:00.004-05:00

Got to Iowa City around 9 or so. I managed to lead the way into the campus by car and actually didn't get lost. We unloaded my stuff into my room. It was such a mess. Then we dropped off my car at the storage lot. It looked so lonely just sitting there as we drove off. It feel weird to be staying here as a student now. Normally I would just leave at the end of the day to go back to WDM, but as my mom, sister and Nick drove away, it brought me to tears. Walked around Iowa City for a bit with the family then after they left I went to go unpack my things. Wow, that took forever. I don't think I brought too much stuff, but it'll be a challenge to keep things organized for a while. My desktop in jammed full with my computer and printer, and all the other crap that I need. On thing I've noticed about dorms, is they don't put outlets where there need to be some. They put the tv cable outlet 10 feet away from any power outlet. I also keep hitting my head on the bunk bed when I stand up from my desk.

College life. It's great. There are people everywhere, and there will be even more people this weekend. I went out to dinner 3 times last night with different people and groups. I like the people I live with on my floor. They rock. By keeping my door open, I met about 8 or so new people. One of the groups I went out to eat with was a group of girls getting ready for rush. It was akward being the only girl not doing it, but they were a pleast bucnh of people to sit with. As I was walking last night, I felt strange. I was here as a student. I was going back to my dorm. I'm competely on my own now. I can do whatever I want, and the closest family member is 2 hours away. Woke up a bit disoriented today, wasn't sure where I was. My alarm went off at 12:01 am, and it took me a few minutes to realize what had happened. Oh, and on a girly note. I think I'd be great at yoga if I can shave my legs in the dorm showers.

~Until Then

The Count Down is Over.

2008-08-19T05:28:00.003-05:00

I've not been able to sleep all night and I've got a 2.5 hour drive ahead of me. There are no more days on my college count down board. I leave in an hour.

My dad came home this weekend. Strangely, it feels like he's been home all summer in a way. I know that sounds awful. He's flying back to Georgia today. He or I won't be home for 2 months. We've started shutting down the house, because no one (including my obese cat) will be occupying it. It's a little weird and heart tugging at the same time.

I didn't really have any heart felt goodbyes to friends at the end of this summer, maybe because I did all that in March and May. Good luck to all of you who are going away this fall.

I spent yesterday with Nick. We didn't do anything fancy or go out to eat. We played 3 games of Parcheesi, went bowling, and drove the entire length of Ashworth. Waste of gas, yea, but worth it. We got some Chinese food and just sorta laid there. We didn't talk about the what if's and the down the road's, we just talked about nothing really. It's going to be hard for me to be away from him, and I don't know what other variables will be thrown into the relationship equation. I don't want to think about those. Two and a half years, and now I'm leaving.

My family and I haven't done anything really special. My dad doesn't want me to leave. He looked really depressed this morning. My mom and I just were still my mom and I, hanging out and talking. My sister and I are still picking at each other. I hope one day we will grow close.

I just now tried to type things to the main readers of this blog that I want to say, but I can't form the words correctly on the page. Maybe things are just best unsaid. Good luck to all, follow your passions they become your dream. Follow your dreams, they become your actions. Don't forget what we as a group stand for and what we've accomplished in the short years we've been together. As my friends, I've come to depend on you and you've helped when I've needed or asked for it. I hope in ways, I've done the same. All of us are creative in the same ways, and then ways that are unique to our persona. You've been the foundation for my life and the things that I do to enhance it. Keep in touch.

I've got butterflies in my stomach. I've been excited all summer, but now that I'm actually leaving, I feel nervous and uncertain. My car is packed with all my boxes and junk. It's weird to see my life for the next 9 months boxed up in the jeep. Can I do this? Maybe the butterflies are actually hunger. Nope, they're butterflies.

~Until Then

Consolation Prize

2008-08-05T06:43:00.002-05:00

So most of you are settling down with a brand new (probably a Macbook/pro) laptop as well all get ready to head off on our college adventure. Well sadly, I am not in that boat due to mother nature's wrath on my mother's business. But, I did receive a consolation prize. My mother felt sorry that I couldn't get my laptop, so she got me a smart pen. And my ipod touch will soon be in hand. It's really neat. The pen (using special inexpensive notebooks), takes over 72 pictures per second and records the audio that is spoken at the time the notes are taken. I can jump anywhere in my notes by tapping them, and the pen will go to the audio recording that matched the notes. Then I can upload them to my computer, and put them on the website. Or I can post the notes to facebook, or even e-mail the audio file to friends. Here is a sample that I tried out while my mother was performing surgery (you won't be able to hear the audio, but you can see my actual handwritten notes). That's my geek post! Yay! And everything was only about $200.

~Until Then

Eventful Night

2008-07-28T22:41:00.003-05:00

So my intelligent boyfriend has a wonderful idea to fulfill before his buddies and I leave for college land. That wonderful idea would be to brew his own bear. Long story short cut to Nick, Erik Clark, Paul Coursen, and myself driving around all over central Iowa looking for bear supplies and ingredients. Nobody has anything, or has any idea on where to get stuff. We finally come across a brewery shop in Valley junction, too bad they're closed. So we come back tomorrow.

Well we then decided to drive out to Jordan creek to see if we could find some malt extract, and low and behold sitting at the Red Robin parking lot, what do we see? Nothing else than the GIRLS GONE WILD bus. We drive around it, and all the windows are covered up and no one is coming or going, but the bus is running. So we take a picture of it and leave.

Now to our final stop of the evening, Buffalo Wild wings. Now most of you have heard of the blazin' challenge. 12 wings 6 minutes. Sounds easy right? No. Super-fucking-melt-your-face-off sauce on top of the most disgusting wings you've ever had in your life. Well, the boys wanted to do it again. Paul had beaten it in the past and just wanted another t-shirt, Nick wanted to try again after coming just 4 wings short of the goal and Erik wimped out and had a cheeseburger instead. So I decided that I would give it a try. The wings finally come out. The boys are freaking, but I have no prior experience so I don't know what to expect. The official timer comes out and we dig in. It's awful. Not the heat of the sauce, I didn't mind that, but those wings. They were awful, but I had to eat them. I had to beat Nick and show up Paul and devastate Erik by having a girl beat him; and I did. I came in barely beating the clock at 5:53. Covered in sauce they snap my picture. I didn't get a shirt because they didn't have my size. I'll go back in a week or so. Forgive me while I go puke. I vow never to touch another hot wing ever again.

Oh and to top off the evening we rented a movie about 4 Amish people deciding not to be Amish anymore and discover the world of sex, drugs, and alcohol.

So overall my evening consisted of beer, girls gone wild, and buffalo wings. Awesome.
~Until Then

Orientation...finally.

2008-07-25T19:39:00.002-05:00

I had my one day orientation today. It went by so fast since they were trying to cram 2 days worth of stuff into one day. I have my schedule, but it's weird that the typical 'Do we have any classes together' shenanigans isn't happening. I'm taking 16 credits, 15 in class and one technology course online. I've got German III 5 days a week in the morning. Acting I 2 days a week, Theatre Design 2 days a week, and my required Accelerated Rhetoric class 2 days a week. I like my schedule, no back to back classes. Only 2 days where I have 3 classes. Monday I'm done after 12:30, Tuesday and Thursday done by 3:30, and Wednesday and Friday I'm done by 5:30. Not too bad. Scheduling was hell. I had the last pick of classes since I'm one of the last groups to come and register. It was a race to figure out what the hell I'm supposed to do for the next 5 years of my life. That's right, I said 5 because I've decided to pursue a double major with Theatre and English Secondary/post secondary education. Awesome. I could do it in four years, but I'd have to be taking summer classes and over 18 credits to do so. I dunno, my mom did something like that, maybe I can do it. Walked around campus and had no idea where anything was really, but the campus is basically in down town Iowa City so there's all sorts of shit to do. Classes start in 31 days.

~Until Then

A friend lost but never forgotten

2008-07-20T18:48:00.002-05:00

Corey-
You lived a life that was long and full of joy
The company that you provided for 15 years and 4 months can never be repaid
We've grown up together one day at a time, never waisting a moment
No one can take away all the endless games of ball and walks to the park
You were a silly dog
Always begging for one more cookie or a piece of cheese
The way you'd rub your head along the couch just so you could get petted
You'd always land with your front paws crossed after jumping up in the air
You were a beautiful dog Corey, the best dog I've ever had
Even those these tears I cry are full of grief and sadness
I know in my heart that you are in heaven now
I love you Corey boy
One day we'll meet again.

Corey
March 20, 1993 - July 20, 2008
The dog who lived to a ripe old age, and lived from flood to flood.

Donor 401 and iPods

2008-06-30T10:17:00.002-05:00

Guys, just be careful when you're desperate for money in college.

Girls, a new use for 'the girls.

My Grandparents are AMAZING people.

2008-06-29T08:09:00.001-05:00

I wish that I was as smart as them. It's unbelievable.

Update

2008-06-19T06:41:00.002-05:00

The floods of 2008 were worse in some areas, fortunately, not my mother's office. She only had about 2 feet of water and for only 2 days. This time around she was able salvage the floor, the counter tops and the interior walls of her business. She was thinking that she was going to be able to open later this week. That's not going to happen. She got a visit from the city yesterday saying that all the businesses that took on water are not going to be able to open until they have the bottom 2 feet of drywall on the inside exterior walls taken out and the insulation replaced to have mold dealt with. My mom is going to be out of business for the next two weeks. She called me crying yesterday.

~Until Then
I'll be home Sunday evening, if there is sketch on Monday I'll be there.
Oh, and if anyone is bored and wants to be a good Samaritan and has free time, there will be a lot of painting to do. Just FYI.

Worse than 93. By far.

2008-06-11T21:41:00.005-05:00

Wednesday- 6:30 am. Nick, my mother, Sam, and I are down at the public works getting sandbags. For the next two hours, we lay down almost 500 sandbags. 2 wide, 2 high. A sheet of plastic then more sand bags. Her entire office surrounded, in hopes of keeping out the water. Things are looking good. The rain from the night before hadn't done much. The roads were still open and the baseball field was still playable.
7pm. We drive back to see how things are. The baseball fields are now a lake with 4 feet of water. You can barely see the fences separating the parks. My sister and I are standing on 16ft square patch of grass taking pictures and throwing stones into the water. We leave. 15 minutes pass and that patch of grass is now 4 inches under water. The parking lot next door at Casey's is filled with stupid on lookers. The police have put up barricades to keep them out. The adjoining business now has water reaching the entire width of the parking lot. 15 feet wide by 1 foot deep. We had to leave.
9:47 pm. The waters have hit the office. The adjoining roads are closed. All we can do is wait.
Thursday- ?

My mom doesn't deserve to go through this again.

~Until Then

I have 14 doors, a freezer, surgery table, and an x-ray machine in my garage

2008-06-10T19:59:00.002-05:00

15 years ago my mom's office (which had only been open for 14 months) was filled with 3 feet of standing water for almost 2 weeks. I don't remember much. I do remember watching my parents wade through the hip deep water trying to fully asses all the damage. It was devastating. All the flooring, bottom cabinetry, and bottom parts of the drywall along with 90% of electrical had to be replaced. My mother was out of business for 6 weeks. Rush Animal Care Clinic was non existent. It reopened on her birthday in August. She thought that she would never have to go through that again; now with all the advancements in flood prevention. She dropped her flood insurance 2 years ago because it was 700 bucks a month. And for something that hadn't been an issue for 13 years; was too expensive. Within the next 24 hours, this could become a reality for my mother, once again.
Monday- 1:30 pm. I get the voice mail from my mother. The one I hoped would never come.
'Manda, it's your mom. Call me.' She sounded serious. I called her. 'Manda, we need you to come down here. It might happen again. We have to move...everything.' Nick and I booked it down to my mom's office. There for the next 7 hours we moved non stop. A majority of the items in the office went up to the attic. Boxes of books, all 4000 of the patient's files, small hand held equipment, 2 computers, grooming equipment, and some small furniture. My poor mother was completely lost yesterday. She didn't sleep at all last night. I could see it in her eyes, the realization of losing her office again. It's one thing to be out of work due to a disaster. It's another things entirely to lose your place of work. Her office is what pays the bills, feeds my sister, gives her car a full tank. Allows her to live. 13 years ago, my mother was married and had a second source of income. That income won't be there if her office goes under.
After all the small stuff went up, it was time to move larger things. Nick's parents came down and helped us move all the doors (2 which are lined with lead) up to my garage, and the freezer where dead things go. Fortunately, the freezer got emptied out yesterday morning. That's all we could do yesterday.
Tuesday: 9am. My mom and I come rolling in with a U haul truck. My grandpa and I take apart all the computer desks, draw files, and other large movable items. The office is down to minimal operations for the rest of the day. Then I had to go to work. I come back around 4. The auto business next door has moved all of its cars. The body shop connected to her is getting the rest of their stuff out. The Casey's across the lot is empty. Not even a crumb remains. I walk in to the deserted office. The washer and dryer have been hoisted up onto the counters. There's nothing left in any of the lower cupboards. No pictures on the walls. Balls of dog hair roll across the floor like tumble weeds. At that point I leave to get sand bags. I get to Public Services and fill up the jeep with 40 sandbags. My mom's emplyee and her mother have already made 3 prior trips. The back door has been boarded up with heavy duty plastic and 20 or so sand bags. The crowd gathers out at the front desk and waits as my mom changes the voice mail. 'We're in the line of the flood. We don't know how long we'll be out, please bare with us.' The office is desolate. Nothing is left. It's awful. My mother has out so much work into that office. We walk out the front door and board it up. The U-haul pulls out, I follow. I'm going back tomorrow at 6am to put sandbags around the remainder of the office, that is if it isn't flooded.
Wednesday- ?

~Until Then

Habits and Destructive Forces

2008-06-07T09:27:00.002-05:00

I felt like I needed to write. I don't have much else to do. I wake up early because I want to keep my habit. I feel more productive in the morning. Sure people aren't up, but it's far more comfortable in the morning. Sure it sucks in the evening when people want to do stuff and it's 10:00 pm and I want to go to bed, but that's going to help me later in life when we all have to live in the real world. I'm not saying I get up at the crack of dawn, but I'm usually up between 7 and 9:30. I'm going to take an 8 am class next year if I can just so it will force me to not stay out late and get mixed in with the wrong crowd. Then I'll be done early afternoon! It's weird the little habits that we all develop. How we go about doing things, and the ways that we do them.
Well now to change directions. My summer thus far. I've decided that I'm going to get out and do stuff this summer, random stuff, just as long as I'm outside or at least being productive. I hate being a vegetable laying on my bed and eating cool ranch doritios. I've had about 15 days of summer and so far I've managed to do...

Buy a BB gun and become fairly accurate in my shooting abilities.
Play multiple games of Crotchet and Super Crotchet, one ended in with the entire Crotchet set in the tree.
Had a picnic by the Sailor ville dam and attempted to throw a boomerang.
Found out that all the fireworks in my boyfriends car are a dud from being in his trunk through the winter.
Lit off several of the dud fireworks.
Planning to tube down the Boone river and eventually Canoe it as well.
I leave for Georgia in a week to go rafting, jet skiing, hiking, kayaking, and camping. And I plan to see my dad for more than 10 seconds.
Had bonding time with my sister.
Saved 4 baby bunnies from certain death by rescuing them from my gay cat.
Built and launched a rocket successfully, only to have it run over by a car because the wind carried it too high.

I'm proud to say that there hasn't been one day where I've just been lying around, I've either done something or worked. I'm also in progress of cleaning out old clothes and tackling all of the areas where my junk just piles up. I've got the clothes down, now I just need to hit my closets. Hope the Chicago trip was fun for those who went, sorry I missed it.
~Until Then

So I'm officially an alumni!

2008-05-26T07:27:00.005-05:00

So we graduated. Yup. How weird is that? I can't believe that I actually made all the way through the West Des Moines School District. 13 years of education under my belt, which will supposedly help me out at Iowa next year. Looking back on it all, it's hard to say that it wasn't a good time. I've met so many people who will remain close to me, even if they aren't physically next to me any more. Teacher's who have impacted my life in ways that they don't even realize. Memories that I can look back and laugh about, and some that bring tears to my eyes (in a good way.) I felt that in these last few years, I've become more open to myself and true to who I am as a human being. Sure others may not like it or me all the time for that matter, but why lie to yourself. I figure, those who truly accept me as a friend will show it, why trying to form relationships with people who I can't stand. I'm done being 'real' to others. I'm never going to see 90% of the people I graduated with ever again. Now that remaining 10% translates into 60 people if you actually put it in perspective. Even that's pushing it. Maybe 5% of the entire 2008 graduates will I actually see over this summer (hopefully) if time allows. I've moved out of the biggest step in my life this far. I've got a diploma, and it feels weird. I just know, that I've got 89 days until I start my first day of class at Iowa. That really doesn't feel all that long.
College. The main reason I'm looking forward to college, is not parties and no parents and little rules, no I'm looking forward to the fact that everyone there has already experienced high school. They know what works, and what doesn't work. (Well most of the them, the people that I'm going to hang out with any ways.) They know how to act, and what to do when called upon. I'm excited. I'm living in the performing arts community. That way I know that my roommate and I will have something in common at least. Sure, I may not be going any where impressive, but I'm still excited to move on with my education towards my education career. I don't know what lies ahead in 89 days, but I can't wait.
My roommate has moved out and the house feels at peace. It's nice to be able to say lets go back to my house and know for a fact that know one is there moping around.
Almost all the high school festivities have come to an end. I've had my grad party and it was a blast. I don't care about the gifts or the money that I received, but what I truly cared about was what people wrote. I have all my cards in a box and they're coming with me next year, so in a time of down-ness, I can read them and look back on the memories that I may have pushed to the back of my mind. I plan to come back home about once a month. Not only for Nick, but to see my friends who are still in high school. I want to keep building those relationships, and come and support them in their drama activities, just as all the alumni did for us. I hope that I will see you at some of those performances.
I also plan to keep updating this. I know that we'll all be hundred of miles apart (except Thane who will be just across campus.) but I think that we've formed a little bonding community here, and I want to keep it up. See how long we all keep writing, see how we all grow over the next 4 years. Sure we won't be able to fully understand all the stuff in the posts that we write, but still. We'll have this to look on and feel just that much more closer to the person who's writing it. So I promise to keep writing. I hope the rest of you do as well.
Well that's my post graduation post, I'm ready to move on.

~Until Then

A week later and...

2008-05-09T17:42:00.004-05:00

I guess I still don't feel like an adult yet. It's probably due to the fact that I'm still stuck in High School (40 hours and counting.) I've done adult things such as smoking a cigar and I got something permanently drawn on my body, but I still have to get up every morning wait for my room mate, drive to school and be there from 7:15 til 1:42 pm. Haven't gotten any new privileges, but I think in time those will come. I have played the I'm an adult card, and I've also played the I'm still an adult but too poor to afford things card as well. It sorta works, for now anyways. My parents finally decided to stop giving me hand me down lap tops and are getting my an Mac Book for my super late birthday present. I won't get it until to July, but it doesn't matter. Being a senior is really expensive, and I don't like it.
On the other hand there is a light at the end of the tunnel, not only do we graduate in about 2 weeks, but even more exciting is the fact the my room mate will no longer be living here as of May 21st! She's going back to her mom's where she can be moody and stay locked up in her room and be gone for what seems like days on end without anyone ever seeing her. She will be out of my hair and there will be a party in her honor of absence!
I can't wait to be done with high school, it's so boring now but I've miraculously managed to maintain rather good grades this year. Well that's it. My first post as an adult.
~Until Then

Finally

2008-04-26T12:48:00.001-05:00

I've help a out a lot longer then most of my senior friends, but it finally hit me 2nd hour on Wednesday how much I want to be done. I've got no motivation left at all. I honestly didn't think it would take this long.

The Subconscious

2008-04-20T08:59:00.004-05:00

So it's always amazing to me what my mind can come up with when I'm dreaming. I've yet to have one of those lucid dreams I've heard about, but I enjoy my own dreams none the less. I had a dream last night, that I was luckily able to remember all of the details to. This dream struck me on an emotional level. It's a dream so it's not going to make complete sense now that I'm awake, but at the time it did.
Nuclear Fallout-
To start off my sister has foreseen the future. There is news of a comet heading right towards earth and we are unable to stop it. It will hit when we are all in school (they would hopefully cancel school on the day that the world is supposed to end I would hope, but anyways) as far as my sister can tell there are only four survivors, myself, Justin Bopp, Casey Cottington, and Mark Rustin. I tell these people that we are the only survivors and that we must stick together. I end up finding Mark first and we get into a class room with the other students and wait. I can see people outside the school laying on the grass, some and running around in the field playing catch. The class room is packed and people are starting to cry. It's hot and breathing gets harder. We count down to the moment of impact. From here my mind takes me to a side scene where a teacher is asked to go take care off something and after she does that, she releases a gas in a side room somewhere and commits suicide. Also in the start of the dream, I have visions of other places (such as bunkers, and other governmental places preparing for impact, but they're safe because of the structure of their building.) Back to present time, we're waiting for the moment of impact, I grab Mark's hand and lean in close. The sky goes dark and then all of a sudden a blinding hot white light fills the area and then it's all over. Now normally, most people in a fallout situation would die instantly, but their demise was different in this dream. How people died was not instantaneous, but rather over the course of an hour or so their brain function would slowly drop. They can recognize faces and names to an extent, but beyond that it's very limited. Eventually they die. I did not see anyone actually die in this dream, I don't think I could have handled that. After the explosion, they started serving lunch, but you had to go outside to get it. People were leaving to go eat, but they had to walk outside, so not only did they become contaminated even more, but the food the ate was also contaminated. Others around me and getting out their cell phones but no connection can be made. I want to call my parents, my sister, my boyfriend, my loved ones who aren't with me, but I can't.
From here I wander around school with Justin. People are in corners just sitting, but at this point no one seems affected by the fallout, but they will. I find Ms. Hansen and tell her what I huge impact she has been on my life while trying not to cry. As I wander, I'm trying to find people like myself who weren't contaminated and by now the others are starting to get affected. They move slower, speak slower, and their brain function has dropped immensely. Now I'm desperate to get to people like myself. I run into Borstad. Affected. Sam. Affected. Kyle. Affected. It's awful. I tell them all that I love them, but the can barely recognize who I am. Tears are streaming down my face as I run into the auditorium. For the first time to me, it no longer feels like home. On the stage I see the Justin, Mark, and Casey. I run up to them. I tell them we should go to the booth but the ladder has been destroyed. I look back and then I wake up.
To me it's amazing how real and raw the emotions all felt. It was happening around me and I couldn't stop. The people that I loved and cared about so much, were wasting away around me. Thank god it was only a dream.
~Until Then

I need sleep.

2008-04-17T20:58:00.002-05:00

I've just woken from a 4.5 hour nap and I'm still exhausted. This play is killing me, and I don't even do much now that tech is over. I feel sorry for some of the leads.

~Until Then

At last, at long last.

2008-04-07T14:30:00.004-05:00

I'm sure that you've read Jordan's and Thomas' on their final wrap up on their careers as a Valley mime, but here's one more. A different point of view I would like to ad. For three years (that's six shows in mime talk) I've been graced to be a part of the Baker's Dozen Mime Tech Crew, not only just a part of it, but the Sound Director. This post is not going to be full of emotions, those all calmed down sometime the Friday or Saturday after the show. I wasn't kidnapped and thrown into the back of a car, mine was less eventful. I was in the tech shop just cleaning away when Liz Bloomburg came in and told me to show up on Monday at 3:00. I did, I was totally lost. There were all these rowdy looking people sitting there talking about Pirates and how much paint we were going to need to get and also to see what we could dig up in the dungeon (pre-borstad cleaning it out era). Now I'm down in the dungeon hanging from rafters looking for something that could possible resemble a pirate wheel. All of them were seniors except for some people that I sorta knew at the time, Emily Dengle, Caitlin Ho, and then there was myself. I didn't know any of these people. Then later that day, Steve-o shows up and grabs Emily and myself and starts talking to us about looping tapes in the green room. We're both sitting there, only having met in freshman IHSSA group mime. Then she's called away by Cam. Great. Flash forward one week. I'm up in the lighting booth for the first time with a headset strapped to my head, a giant board in front of me filled with all sorts of dials and switches listening to Cam say 'Go Sound' and Henderson telling me to shut the hell up and stop singing. Before I know it, my first mime show is over. I really wanted to move from the booth to being on stage. So I tried out and didn't make it. And I'm glad. I love my job and what I get to experience for four short weeks out of the year. I get to hang out with the some of the goofiest fucking people I know and help produce a show that hundreds of people are going to see and be screaming for. I've found two of the people that I shall forever remain close to. Had someone told me that I would love these people and do anything for them my sophomore year, I would have thought they were lying. Turns out they were right. These guys (mimes and techies) became my first family. I would do anything for them. Three years flew by fast. After the seniors left, the rest of my friends became in charge like I was. We were all think 'WTF! How are we going to do this. We don't know what the hell we're doing.' But somehow, we came together and did it. We ran four shows together and worked hard to give the mimes a set and a great show to go with it. I'm sitting 60 feet away from the stage watching my friends grow up these past three years. Talking to Emily and Kyle of the headsets and watching skit after skit unfold before my eyes. I may not be the one that is wearing the white makeup and running around in slippers and tights, but I'm a part of it none the less. Coming together for those few short weeks, means more to me than anything else in the world. I'm glad it's all done, I know that we're leaving it all in good hands. When I graduate, I'm leaving more than just brick on the wall, I'm leaving a part of me behind.

...Go sound...

~Until Then

Mime Show

2008-03-28T07:17:00.002-05:00

"Now the seats are all empty, let the roadies take the stage. Pack it up and tear it down. They're the first to come and last to leave working for that minimum wage. They'll set it up in another town."

~Jackson Browne

I did not have the time or energy to write a post like Thomas did; but I will. But until then.

Unmotivated

2008-03-23T18:55:00.003-05:00

So it comes down to the final quarter I will ever spend in high school. I've now become completely unmotivated to do any of my homework that is passed due. For instance, I've got 2 assignments in APC averaged out both are worth 65 points, but yet I do not do them, even though Hardin has given me more than a reasonable extension on one (try well over a month now with spring break done) and the other 2 weeks. I've calculated my grades out and I will get a D for the semester if I don't do them. But even that still can't bring me to do them. Fuck it. My grades are (not counting Gym) 5 A's and a D for the quarter if things carry out correctly, and last semester I was 5 A's and a B. Not bad for a senior, granted I am taking nothing but Art and Writing classes, but none the less. The only thing that is possibly motivating me is the fact that this is a college credit class, but if I pull a B or C off next quarter than I'll be set with 24 credits that are all A's one B and one C. That will still give me a GPA for Iowa of 3.63. Not bad.
Spring Break is a wonderful thing and a terrible thing as a senior. It's nice to relax, sleep in, and catch up with friends, but it's a week where your brain doesn't have to function. My brain doesn't like to function on things that it doesn't have to. So this last quarter I think that I'm going to be diagnosed with a full blown case of Senioritis. Great, just what I need. We're 63 days away from Commencement (that's with weekends) and 42 school days left. That's not a lot of time when you think about it. I only have to bull shit stuff for 210 more hours of my education. I think I can do that. Man, I'm motivated to write this, but I still won't do my APC homework.
~Until Then

IHSSA Love

2008-03-17T16:59:00.004-05:00

Few know that mimes are known to have sweet dance skills.

I feel like we should be walking into the sunset. Montage anyone?

Last minute crappy improv.

I wish all my imaginary friends were real.

^I love this photo.
<---Hard work paid off.
Heroine anyone?

Four Organs In Each Jar!

2008-03-14T08:44:00.002-05:00

So it's officially Spring Break. I'm looking forward to this one. I've taken off work and have no commitments what so ever that I oppose to as of right now. I'm going to enjoy this spring break and catch up on some very late APC homework. The play is halfway through, and for some reason, I just don't feel as connected to this one. It might have something to do with not getting an actual part, but I know that because of that I get to spend more time on tech where my time can be better spent. That set is going to be sweet, and I can't wait till those mornings where I have to be there at 8am on Saturday and get covered in paint and saw dust. It's so much fun.
I see that Jordan and Thomas are posting a lot about the mime show. It's coming up so fast that I don't really want to deal with it at some points. It's funny, every show when the mimes and the techies dress up, there are so many people that ask me if I'm a mime. It's usually the same people every show, and I gently remind them that I am a techie. I know that there are some days that the mimes want to absolutley kill us, and we become so bitchy because we don't have the cooperation we need from them. But when it comes down to it, we both rely on each other. This is my 6th and last mime show, and I've come to realize that that is the best family I've ever been in. Sure I don't go to the Sunday night meetings, or I don't have the ties that our stage manager has with the mimes, but I still feel apart of it all. Is that so wrong? I spend 2 weeks twice a year with these people, and work my ass off for them. I love it. The biggest gift that you guys have ever given me was not only my job, but last fall show when you actually waited for the people in the booth to make it onto the stage. That was a great feeling for actually getting recognition for doing stuff behind the scenes even if it didn't flow as well as we all hoped. Well that's my bit for the mime show. 7:30 March 27. Valley. Be there, or I will have my pet porcupine rape you in the face.

~Until Then

IHSSA-4 years of Mime and Improv

2008-02-18T14:22:00.003-06:00

Okay so 2008 IHSSA has offically ended. It's been an experience to say the least. It was nice to be in the same two catergories for 3 consecutive years. I've gotten the hang of it, and really refine my skills as an improver and a solo mime. Dare I say that I've become known as the Valley Solo Mime? I don't know. But I've enjoyed being one. I get such a rush when I become a different charater and I can't rely on my voice. I've learned how my body works under pressure and how to control my movements to make an impression. I only count on myself, and so therefore I get all the attention. It's not 'we did it' or 'we made it', it's 'I did it. I made it' Cocky? Yes maybe. But totally worth all the hard work. I'm proud of myself and where I've gone in drama.

So what the hell was up with this year? Good lord, the three varsity mimes got there asses kicked. What's the hell? The districts judge this year, has been a judge at the state level the past two years, who has given me a nomination for All State. I just don't get it. It was heartbreaking to see that two on the list. Yes, I cried. I'm devoted to what I do. I love it. No more chances at winning the banner, no more mime rehearsals, no more walking out of the room all sweaty and full of energy after performing to intense music. Nothing. It took me a while to get over that. I was determined to make Claussen proud. He has been amazing to work with these past 2 years. I'll miss him.

But then Lauren, the underdog of all the mimes, some how, some way, managed to defy all odds and make her up the ladder of IHSSA and land herself a spot at All State. Working with her these past 4 months has been a blessing and a gift. She started out with no mime skills, nothing at all. But we rehearsed and practiced and challenged her skills, and look where she landed! I could not be more proud of her. After the critics at All State had nothing but wonderful things to say to her, that truly topped the cake. After she finished her skit, I was crying. I was so happy for her. All throughout contest, I believe that I was far more nervous than she was. I was talking with Mary about what it's like to be a coach. It's one thing to stand up there and perform some one elses skit, and then take the comments and critisms that come along with it. But it's a whole other world to take someone and give them your skit, that you wrote, that you developed and watch them perform your ideas. After they perform it, you get feedback. There's nothing that you can do about it. You have to sit there patiently and watch as you are critiqued through another person. You can't do anything about it. When they are performing your skit, you can't walk up there and fix their mistakes, you have to sit and endure it. I can't wait to be a coach and a full time educator.
I may not have ever won a banner, but being able to take a skill that I've developed and pass it on to someone else and have them do just as well as you could have done, I think I may have a knack for this teaching thing. I hope I keep it.
Improv. Wow, what an impact. It's been an adventure, and I'm glad that I've endured it. Having the same partner 2 years in a row, and making it to the top both times. Two girls out of 80 teams to make to All State twice. We've learned how to communicate without words. We can work off of each other, and we found our place in the improv scene. Serious. It's a first really, to do a chain of serious natured scenes. I'm proud to call Joanna my partner, we work so excellently together.
I've been asked what's been my favorite All State. That's tough. They all mean something different to me. Sophomore year, my first festival, two events. What an experience. Truly amazing, and to have 2 more years to do this. Junior year, top of my game. Favorite solo mime ever, had the best scene for improv ever that year at state and went to All State for it. Senior year, working with my seasoned improv partner for the second year, and also having my directed solo mime make it to All State. If I had to pick between Lauren and myself to go on, I'd pick her in an instant. I've been to All State before, she hasn't. She's more important.
To my team mates-
You've been amazing to work with and watch over the past 4 years. Thank you guys so much. You rock my world. Keep up the good work and I don't want to lose touch with you guys.
Lastly to my coaches
Ted- You started me off and taught me the joy of Solo Mime. Encouraged me to explore outside of my comfort zone.
Claussen- Our time was cut short this year, but that happens. You helped me develop my true passion for theatre and mime. You pushed me to limits of physical endurance and mental capacity. Thank you. I've learned how to move and control my body and communicate without words. Given me two excellent and demanding characters to develop and give a personality. Thank you.
Joe- You've been more than just a coach to me, you've been a mentor as well. The lessons that you've taught me will continue to stay with me over the course of my life. You've shown me the bar, then raised it, and then raised it again. You've taught me to trust my instincts and to go against the grain in the same evening. You've encouraged and helped me from day one all the way to now. I started out at a 1 and with your help, I've managed to take it to a ten. Thank you for everything that you've ever done for me.
IHSSA is done, it's been a journey, a truly wonderful journey.
~Until Then

Senior year thus far

2008-01-11T09:07:00.000-06:00

This is not my peak year, that was last year. I was at the top of my game then, and having fun with everything. Not so much this year, everything gets in the way of everything else. School is a miserable nightmare. Frequently I find myself frustrated with not only my classes and several of my teachers, but myself as well. I know that I could really push my performance, but I don't want. I just want to hit my deadlines and finish my work, get the grade, and move on with the next project. That's how I work, I need to be busy, I need to be active. But I also need to have time to complete these projects, and I'm finding that this year, there just isn't any. Schedules are becoming packed, people are unavailable, things are going the way they should.
Although I guess I appreciate how this year is a transition year. My dad is gone every other 2 weeks for two weeks to go work down in Georgia for another doctor who wants to quasi retire. He loves it down there. There are so many more opportunities for him to expand what he does. Recently he also acquired a new girlfriend, who is actually normal. I know right? Stop the presses!!! She seems really nice from what I've heard, and she's actually normal looking in the photos I've looked at, plus my dad seems to have this certain uplifting. I'm really happy for my dad, but at the same time I wish he was home. If it weren't for Erika, the house would be so empty.
Living with Erika has been an experience so far, I love the girl to death, but I'm not exactly fond of her boyfriend. He's a hassle. Neither of them have a car, so I often have to pick/drop off one or the other and run some errands for them. Plus she's a night owl and I'm an early bird, so we often don't see each other during breaks. Oh well, the good out ways the bad. We've gotten ourselves into a mess of trouble over our piercings and outings.
As for my personal life, I guess it's been better and it's been worse. Yes Nick is still in town, but he works 40 hours a week and goes to Ankeny DMACC. I don't get to see him as often, but I'll get to see him even less when he's off at ISU and I'm at Iowa. He's become really irked at my activities this year, he's always saying that I'm putting the ahead of him and that I should drop several of them to accommodate more time for him. Also, I find myself more often than I should looking at him and thinking 'Am I really going to be able to spend the rest of my life with you?'. We'll see where this goes later.
First semester is over, and my GPA is still intact. I'm glad that it's over. My group of friends is once again shifting all over the place. My best friend is no longer in school with me, and I all I want to do is get out.

~Until Then

Impact

2007-12-14T21:03:00.000-06:00

It's funny. You never realize how big an impact someone has on your life until your sitting 20 feet above them and they don't know that you're there. Later, when your standing right in front of them, you can't even think of words to thank them with because they are simply just that important to you. You try to talk and mumble a few sentences while trying to choke back the tears. But somehow the message gets across and they understand even if no words were conversed. You then realize, that all those years ago, they set you on the path where you are now and where you're going, and you didn't even recognize it at the time. When it does finally hit you, it's either too late to do anything about it or you keep going. I chose to keep going.

~Until Then

After all these years....

2007-11-25T08:33:00.000-06:00

I watched it. I finally watched the first Lord of the Rings. It was very good. I watched it with Emily D. and Caitlin M. who had also never seen the LOTR trilogy. Just goes to show that are more of us out there. Well were. More posts to come, hopefully. I feel kind of bad about not posting. But yea, okay.

~Until Then

Acceptance #2

2007-09-23T17:49:00.000-05:00

So I'm going to Iowa. Yay!!! I think that their programs have more to offer me in my area of interest. It's going to be more fun than I think I can handle sometimes. I'm glad I'm staying instate. I don't want to drive 12 hours to get to college, and since I'm becoming a teacher, I don't want to spend the next 45 years paying off my loans to some expensive private school. Yea, so some of you may just say 'oh it's Iowa. whatever, that's not impressive.' I'm proud of my self and I'm looking forward to it. Oh, and if I were to receive no financial aid, no grants or scholarships, my 6 years of education (4 for a B.A. and 2 for my masters) will run a grand total of $107,178. Yay expensive!

~Until then

Acceptance!

2007-08-29T17:47:00.000-05:00

I got my ISU acceptance letter today. Yes, I know that it isn't the best school, or the most exciting thing, but I'm proud of myself. It's my future, and I want to plan it. It feels good to be holding my future in my hands. ISU is probably going to be my fall back school if I don't make it into Iowa, but I doubt I'll have much problem with that. But it's nice to know that I have somewhere to go after VHS. I'm proud of myself.

Tis the Last Day of Summer

2007-08-21T10:14:00.000-05:00

No more days of sleeping in until 1. No more days of lounging in your pj's and eating Doritos and pudding. It's amazing how fast this summer has flown by, it's crazy in a sense. We start school in less than 24 hours, our last year of high school for most of us. One last year of living in our little box, before being pushed into the real world. For most of us, this will be the last year that we ever see, or even talk to each other. It's sad that I'll lose contact with some of my very good friends, but drifting apart is a fact of life. All of you have taught me so much about yourselves, myself, life, society, etc. I'll never forget it. This little community that one by one we've slowly formed has been a part of me for 4 years now; and to see how each of us has developed and coped with becoming an adult. The realization of life. A part of me doesn't want to leave, doesn't want to let go of what I've become so familiar with, but then a small part of me does. It's excited for the next 4-6 years of college, it's excited to meet new people and learn new concepts and ideas, but it's also afraid. Afraid of not being accepted, afraid of not being able to cope, and mostly it's afraid of not being able to fulfill it's goals that it so desperately wants to achieve. But May is a long way off, but it will be here before we know it, and before I watch my friends, and eventually myself walk across the stage to receive that long awaited diploma, I've got one more year to make it count, one more year to be a kid at heart. I've got one more year, and I'm not going to waste it. So here's to us, Thomas, Kyle M, Kyle H, Thane, Jordan, and Amanda, make it count. Don't forget it. I love you guys, and this year is going to be one hell of an adventure.

~Until Then

So here I sit

2007-07-30T00:51:00.000-05:00

It's 1 in the morning, and I'm still up much to my own surprise. My computer playing the same soundtrack it has been for the past 4 hours. Background noise more than anything else. I can hear the sounds of crickets humming softly in the background as I feel my eyes going dry from staring at my computer screen forever. The outside air is cool and comfortable, and much more standable than the AC level in the house that my dad will refuse to move to a temperature that is above freezing. I can't believe that school is almost here, just one more year. One more year I have to hold onto my childish memories, one more year to change my mind, one more year to crawl under my blankets and have my dad call me in sick so I don't have to face the real world, one more year to be me without having to worry about what I want to do in life. One more year, and all that could change in the blink of an eye. I feel happy, no regrets or worries, no shames to shy away from, no second thoughts about what I'm going to do.
This is my life, and I'm who I want to be.
~Pichler

Piece by piece

2007-07-06T09:14:00.000-05:00

Piece by piece my world seems to be slipping between my fingers. School has been out for a month and I've already managed to completely shatter a relationship with an amazing friend, and shut down the communication barrier with another. My stress level has not settled since, and even though I won't ever see these people at school, it's just that I know I hurt them and I know that I've lost a good friend.
I'm also beginning to lose what I saw in Nick when I first fell in love with him. Yes I loved him, I don't care what any of you say about 'teen love' it can exist. But over the past few months, going far back as January, I'm not sure I feel the same way about him anymore. I've been with him for about 16 months, and we've had some amazing times together. But recently things just haven't had the 'spark' that I'm used to. Yes, I know that relationships can't be exciting all the time, but there should still be that something there that can hold two people together. So I'm not sure how much longer we'll be together. I leave Monday to go to North Carolina with him and his folks for 2 weeks, so hopefully that time together will help us regain what we've lost. I can only hope.
I have a feeling that somewhere within the next 12 months, I'm going to have another big blow out with my mother and not speak to her for a period of time. She
s starting to be forceful again and I feel very uneasy around her. I know that she's my mother and that she tries to steer me in the correct direction, but I just don't feel comfortable around her. My sister is going into 7th grade this year, and I can only hope that will bring us closer together before I leave. She's said that she's going into drama, and I can only hope that she will stick with it. So, I really want us to be closer than we are now, before I leave for 4 years; even though I'm staying instate, I don't want us to be distant.
Amidst the bad there are some good things in my life keeping me sane. I had my senior pictures done on Tuesday and they we're a blast to do. Both Tim Vorland and Dirk were some of the nicest people I've ever met and I can't wait to see the finished products. I believe that they captured the creative side of me and really understood what I wanted from out of my photos.
I've been contacting Elena recently and we've been trying to make plans to meet up and hang out, I miss having her in my life and for the past year things have been rather tense between us, and I will take partial credit for that happening. But I want to regain our once strong bond and make the best out of our senior year.
Erika is moving in with me in August and will be staying with me for the duration of the school year. I'm excited to have someone my own age to talk to and hang out with. It'll be an experience, even if I have to share my bathroom for the first time in 7 years. She's a lovely person and I hope that she can feel at home here at the Pichler house.
A week or so ago, Rocky, my gay cat, ran away. We let him outside, but he always comes home within 24 hours or so. But it was 3 days, and there were no signs of him. But then I heard a meow at our garage door and there he was. Apparently someone had taken him in, because he smelled of smoke. So I washed him and got him a collar, which he's already managed to lose, so I'll get him another one. My family is just glad he knows where home is.
Note to Thespians: the officers met late in June and talked about possible retreats and outings, I'm not saying anything else, but we will get together before the summer is out and I can't wait.
There's 2 months left in summer, and I hope that they got far better than June has.
~Until Then

Let it Begin- Just like a quart of Ice Cream!

2007-06-06T09:40:00.000-05:00

So summer has officially started, and so far things have been pretty interesting.
~Erika Dejoungh is in the process of moving in with my family for a year and a half because she doesn't want to move to Ames, and I though that I could be a nice person and give her a home. I mean mines big enough and there's plenty of space.
~ I leave for the Wisconsin Dells next week, my dad decided this last night and we managed to book a house for 4 days up there.
~ We're finishing remodeling our kitchen, I've spent the past 2 days or so waiting for plumbers and ripping up counter tops. It's pretty awesome.
~ I booked my senior portraits with Vorland Photography, and I've been getting very excited over that. It's going to be a fun time and I get to do out doors at Valley Junction and at the Art Center. I finally feel like senior, and after 12 years of waiting it's going to be worth it. I've got a very very easy schedule next year and I can't wait to reap all the benefits of being a senior!! Kudos to Thomas, Jordan, Mary, Andi, Thane, and Kyle, we've made it. Enjoy your senior year, and do what ever the hell you want to, it's out last chance before we leave our homes that we've been so safe in for the past 17 years.

Oh yea, I've watched episodes IV and V of Star Wars.
~Until Then

Being Sick on Your Birthday is No Fun

2007-05-03T10:00:00.000-05:00

Okay, so yesterday I went out to eat with my dad, his gremlin looking girlfriend, Nick, and his parents. My dad managed to successfully embarrass the crap out of me with in the first 5 minutes of being at the restaurant. My birthday went pretty well during the dinner, but prior and after that I felt absolutely miserable. I was sick all day and I was running a fever of 101.7 accompanied by a massive head ache. But I got a gas gift card and a girly pamper day at the spa. That made me feel better. Romeo and Juliet is done, but I still haven't found that massive amount of free time I was hoping to acquire. Maybe because it's may, and maybe because everyone else is just wanting to get the Fuck out of high school. Who knows? All I know is that I felt like I was going to collapse if I didn't stop or run into a brick wall.

~Until Then

It's Done!

2007-04-30T17:28:00.001-05:00

Thank fucking god Romeo and Juliet is done.

Good Mood

2007-04-12T17:35:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I decided that I was going to confront my fears of Mr. Schebel. Him and I didn't get along at all by the end of the semester. He was my EBL and Creative Writing teacher, back to back mind you, and our relationship was a rather rocky one. I know some of you reading this think that he's god, while other would rather keep their distance from him, I was one of those who just down right hated him for existing. I won't go into much detail on why I hated him for the better part of 3 months, and the fact that I was terrified of him, but he attacked my work and my mental stability without even thinking twice. Please spare the long comments on why, how I fucked up and he was just teaching me, there is more to the story than what I want to share. Only he and I know the whole, I haven't event told Nick really anymore that what I'm saying here. Anyways, I went and talked to him originally to thank him for allowing me to speak to his creative writing classes about Closed Caption. After that, he said that he was sorry for the rough time that we've both had with each other. I apologized for some of my actions, not all, just some but mainly for ignoring him and giving him the occasional 'death glare' while passing in the halls. We sat there and talked for about an hour, the first 30 minutes was focused on how things spiraled out of control and what our thoughts were on each other, the last 30 mins. was spent me bitching about the play and other things and just swapping ideas and stories and what not. It was a good deal. In the end, I felt better. I got everything off of my chest, and I can say that the weight was instantly gone. I haven't felt that good about myself in quite some time. The rest of the day was just really whole heartedly good, despite Nick almost burning my house down. I guess I respect him as a person, not a teacher, but as a person. And I can say that we do pass each other in the hall ways with a 'hello' or a smile and a wave. It was a good day.
~Until Then

Laramie Re-opened

2007-04-01T09:23:00.000-05:00

I was at the mall last night with a friend and we were just walking around waiting for our movie to start, as we walked towards the food court we saw three guys walking toward us with shirts saying "Erase Hate...". Well immediately this caught my attention thinking they had made their own Laramie Shirts because they were from a different school or they didn't have a chance to get the shirts Valley was selling. As we passed I turned my head back to see what the rest of their shirts said, and their to my complete shock was the rest of the quote with a picture, "Be straight." And a sign with a man and a woman holding hands. Like a bolt of lightning, I felt myself being flushed with anger and became red in the face, as well as my friend. I was shocked that people could be that cruel and rude in our community. I know that people are still angry with Valley for producing Laramie Project and that they still think that homosexuality is wrong, and I accept that; but to be parading it around in plain view of hundreds of other people. Why should they get away with that kind of thing? I was so tempted to go yell at them, but as I started to turn back towards them, my friend grabbed my wrist and said that it wasn't worth the fight. I stopped and I let my adrenaline settle back down and I came to my senses. People like that, who go through life with a closed mind, will never accomplish or amount to anything. They think that they can just say what they want and never be punished for it. I hope that those guys will come to their senses one day, hopefully before they are fathers or husbands. Because if they pass those same values down to their children, right there is another generation already tainted by a closed minded individual. And then it's only time will tell before the incident in Larmaie happens all over again.
~Until Then

PS- In other news, as I was driving I saw a handicapped van, license plate, sticker and all with a bumper sticker that said, "Give Blood, Play Hockey." That made me laugh a bit.

Favorite Noun

2007-03-29T09:51:00.001-05:00

This is the photo that I took for my intro class. It's not the final version but it's what I had time to post. My class really liked my photo.

~Until Then

Ahh the wonderful world of cell phones.

2007-03-21T21:22:00.000-05:00

It's true, most people now a days can't be spotted in public without their cell phone somewhere on their person. These great tiny devices allow for us, at the push of a single button, to send information and communication to people all over the world via text, image, or sound. As with every piece of technology, there are bound to be glitches or just people misusing it. You have to love the 3 am phone calls from the number you've never heard of, or even better, rare, but better, the text messages from people you've never heard off mistaking your number for a friend of their's. Here's a conversation I took part in today. Complete with mispellsing.

#- Dont send me thosee cheese snakcs anyuore, they're groooss. They give me bad gas.

(I receive this message and ponder for a moment. Normally I would just delete it or send a message back saying wrong number, but I decided to reply otherwise.)

Me- I'm sorry, I thought you really liked them, I didn't realize you were just trying to be nice.
#- Itsokay. You dont haev too get me anything. PS whats with the pickle?

(For those of you who've been so lucky as to get a text from me, I sign my name as 'The Pickle' by default.)

Me- ...?
#- Wait waht the FUCK!! WHO ARE YOU!! Fuck fuck fyck fyck fuck!
#- This convistaion nevar happnd.

I laughed and then proceeded with the rest of my day.
~Until Then

Holy Shitters

2007-03-20T11:32:00.000-05:00

This blog is over 3 years old. Wow.
~Until Then

A good use of time

2007-03-20T11:27:00.000-05:00

Whenever you have a spare 10 hours, why not spend it dyeing your hair?? It's loads of fun and you get to watch your sink and or tub turn bizzare colors!!

~Until Then

We Call Them Pirates Out Here

2007-03-10T14:27:00.001-06:00

Probably the best freakin YouTube video EVER!!!

2007-03-03T06:58:00.000-06:00

" Yea sure, I'll break him out jail, I guess, just as long as I get extra credit."

2007-02-25T06:08:00.000-06:00

Obsessions- It's amazing to me how quickly then can appear and how quickly they can disappear. And when it finally leaves, you really don't notice that it's gone until someone close to you asks you about it. I look back and realize the large number of obsessions I've had over the years, from hot pockets to converse, being a tom boy to what I want to do in the future. It's astounding how quickly a year goes by and how it shapes you into a different person. I mean in 7th grade all I wanted to do was be one of the guys. I dressed like a guy, wearing my clothes 2 sizes too big and then finally cutting my hair short and. I also wanted to go into automotive and wood construction as my major in college. Now 4 years later I plan to major in theater/ directing and possibly pull a double major in technical theater and a minor in creative writing or speech. I know where I'm going to school after Valley and I know what I want to do with my life. I'm dressing more girlish than ever, not Abercrombie preppy, but I guess as some would put, more appropriate for my figure and activities. I look back and I think how easily all that changed. It wasn't 2 years ago where I was sure I was going to Simpson to major in Music and minor in Education. Where I am in life right now, I'm happy with. I hope that it doesn't change for me. I'm happy and I want to stay that way.

~Until Then

2007-02-13T21:18:00.000-06:00

Here's a few photos from the valentines dance. It was fun an the decorations were really sweet. PS- Pie at Perkins at 1:30 am is an experience. You should try it some time. I'm not kidding.

Nick and A Martinin
Best Buds
Pretty
Love Forever

2007-02-05T16:59:00.000-06:00

HOLY FREAKING CRAP!! THIS IS AMAZING!!! GO VALLEY!! TWO YEARS IN A ROW BABY!!

2006-12-31T17:11:00.000-06:00

Okay so I haven't posted in well over a month. Deal with it. Nothing much has happened that was blog worthy. Christmas, great. Thanksgiving, sucked balls. New Years, who knows. I guess this is my 'fuck it' post. Who cares? You didn't write it, and you don't have to keep reading it. Bitch. Bitch. Bitch. Whine. Whine. Whine. So 2006? Hell of a lot better than 2005 that's for sure. 2007? Who knows. 365 more glorious days to screw myself over in various situations and then somehow manage to wiggle my way out of it with only minor scars, hopefully. So I here I sit, the middle of my junior year with a threatened GPA, cold toes, and a glass full of eggnog. Yea I look back on 2006 with some pretty damn fond memories of what happened. Did some sweet things, met some cool people, did things that I probably shouldn't have. Do I regret it? Not one fucking bit. I chose to do the things that I did, and I don't hold any deep dark twinges in my heart/soul. Wouldn't trade any of it. If you're reading this to find out some deep dark secret, tough luck. But I bet if you dug deep enough in the halls of Valley, you could probably find what you're looking for. It's not that hard, I mean is practically graffitid all over the auditorium. Something happens to people, and they flip. Holy shit, it's the end of the world. There goes their reputation right down the fucking drain, right? Wrong. There's life after high school, believe it or not. Yea I was in the whole 'rep down the drain' boat about 10 months ago, but then I found people who didn't care what I did, said, thought, etc. That helped, a lot. Hmm, maybe that's why I'm neck deep in a 10 month relationship with the best thing that's ever happened to me. Who knows? Screw what I've done, said, thought, etc. I don't care, judge me. I mean how many people actually see beyond the purple hair and high tops? I'll never know. 'It's the real thing that keeps me hanging on.' I'd be surprised if you're still reading this, congrats. Bitch Bitch, Whine Whine.
~Until Then

2006-11-23T09:21:00.000-06:00

I truly despise the holiday of Thanksgiving. I have my own reasons, not to ruin anyone else's. I don't think I'll enjoy Thanksgiving, until I have a family of my own. Hooray for not spending Thanksgiving with my family.
~Until Then

2006-11-21T06:41:00.000-06:00

Okay so last night was my first real practice for solo mime and improv. I thought I had signed up for solo mime and improv, but apparently I signed up for 3 hours of aerobics an physical training. I'm not kidding, I had a slight sweat when I left both of my events. Gross, yea. But Mr. Clausen is working me to no end. If you look on the drama board, it says "Pichler- Pirate Mime". That's all I'm going to say about it until parents night. It's really amazing, and I've got most of it worked out so far. Just have to tackle the hard stuff next week. Improv was pretty much amazing last night. When I first saw my name on the list, I was disappointed. I really wanted to be in Choral Reading or Musical Theater, but as the day wore on I was pumped for the rehearsal. Last night there were 6 of us, plus 2 directors. The freshmen actually work really hard, and they were really good last night for their first time for IHSSA. I've also noticed, that within those two hours, how I hard I was working on my technique and form. Yea, we didn't do any skit work, but our group activities and character walks really helped. I'm looking forward to this year. Can anyone say All State??
~Until Then

2006-11-05T20:45:00.000-06:00

It's done with....Finally!!!
I'm not going to do a whole big post on the Laramie Project, I'm worn out and I'm neck deep in a massive writing assignment. So here are the top 10 things I've learned/experienced by being a part of The Laramie Project
1. It's a lot of work to do a mowhawk
2. It's a lot of work to do a 4th show
3. Some guy recognized me as Buzzard Fishbeck...akward
4. I'm losing my hair...slowly
5. WBC is very unimpressive
6. Parents should never be on Tech...they ruin my words
7. Hauling all of your own costume pieces to school, means you have to haul them all back.
8. Freshmen.
9. Hearing the sound of a full house applause is orgasmic
10. Tech has its benifits
~Until Then

2006-10-12T06:09:00.000-05:00

*NOTE: This is one of those life realization posts so yea, okay.
On Tuesday, I went to go pick up my sister from 6th grade. I walked in about 5 minutes before the bell rang, so I sat down on a bench and just sorta looked around at what was familiar and what wasn't in that school. A few minutes later, a group of 1st graders came walking down the hall from Art Class. These small children wandering down the hall behind their teacher carrying their pencil boxes and sketchbooks. They're so small. I can't believe that at one point, we were that small as well. It's bizzare. And to think from that a 1st grader's point, they still have 11 years before they graduate. We have 1. One year! Where did our childhood go? What happened to nap time and staying out of the sweets jar before dinner? Where did they go? It just seems to me that this time has passed us by so fast, we're never going to get it back. Then yesterday I went on a college visit to ISU with Nick. The campus is gorgeous! We got a tour of some of the main halls and then went into one of the residence halls and had a pretty yummy lunch. When we got to ISU, we watched a Power Point about why you should come to ISU and all the benifits and acceptance things there are at ISU. I was blown away. I had always thought that I would never want to go to a State school, simply because they were too large. I didn't want to feel like a number. So I had my heart set on Simpson. More expensive = less crowded. But that power point pretty much convinced me that I wanted to go to ISU and what they had to offer me, was more than anything I could ever hope for in a University. I talked with two teachers there on campus, one in music and one in theater. From about 8th grade, I've always wanted to do something in music, but not major in it. Well music eduaction is only a major, but the lady told me that out of the 900+ students invloved in the music programs, only about 130 were music majors/minors. My passion for music will never die, but I need to persue my love of theater. Before I left the Music Hall, I listened to the State's Men's Choir. It was fantastic!! I've never heard a sound like that! And a guy that I was talking to before class, was a history major. It was very cool. After I left the hall I headed to Pearson Hall to talk with Jane Cox about theater. She then pretty much convinced me that I was definantly coming to ISU. The theater program there is fantastic. They do 9 shows a year and they have a family so you don't feel like a number there. Yay!! And they have exactlly the major I want with a few empahsis in Directing, Acting, and Technical Theater. Then a minor in Performing Arts. This is what I want to do for the rest of my life. Help others discover the joys of theater. Two years ago, I was sitting there as a freshmen thinking, "Pssht, I've got 4 years left of High School." Now I'm thinking "Man this is what I want to do with my life. This is who I wan't to be. Here's how I make that happen." So whether you're carring a penical box and crayons, 1000 Page text books and binders, or persuing your Major, it's all the same thing. Make the most of what you have, reach for your dreams, and don't let and moment be meaningless.
~Until Then

2006-09-23T07:54:00.001-05:00

2006-09-19T10:20:00.001-05:00

This is a real word in the German language, you can even ask Frau Marasco. It has something to do with the occupation of a widow's late husband.
Donaudampfschifffahrtselektrizitatenhauptbetriebswerk-bauunterbeamtengesellschaft.

2006-09-14T18:47:00.000-05:00

Lesson Plan
Twelve plus years we spend in school
Only to fall asleep in our texts books
And wake up in a puddle of our own drool.
“Open you books to chapter ten.”
And read through this material
Just so that we can forget it all over again.
“Your homework is to take notes over twenty-two.”
Then write a 70 page paper
On how salt reacts with glue.
But somehow they always seem to forget to mention
That if we don’t turn it in,
We should prepare ourselves for five hours of detention.
As weeks grow by our minds get weary
Staying up until dawn
To study for the killer test in Theory.
Slowly you seem to crash and burn
People seem to notice
But of course there is no where safe to turn.
Thoughts of terror run through your head
Wouldn’t the world be better
If one morning you turned up dead?
Your parents stopped giving you kisses and hugs
So now you must begin
To rely on alcohol and drugs.
One day your teacher wishes to see you ‘after class’
“Oh great”, you think
“God I hate this teacher, he’s such an ass.”
“Something is wrong, what can I do?”
You stand there glaring and thinking
“Shut the hell up, I’ve got no dealings with you.”
But instead you smile say
“It’s just stress, that’s all.”
And then continue on your way.
You reach deep inside and pull out a smile somehow
Your teacher seems satisfied
But perhaps just for now.
You walk a bit drudgingly slow
Far from behind you hear
“I’m always here for you, you know.”
Thinking now how you hate him so
And in the single instant
Hatred in your heart begins to grow.

Home is where the heart is, or so they say
If that saying is true
Then why do you push everyone there, away?
Finally you just can’t seem to take it anymore
So one night you take a rope
And hang it high above the family room floor.
You slip it on and tighten the noose
Breathing very fast
Praying that it doesn’t come loose.
Your heart begins to beat unbearably fast
You stand on a chair
Hoping that the pain doesn’t last.
But as you do so you glance to your right
To notice the family portrait
Sitting so peacefully in the fluorescent light.
Thinking of all the people you’ll hurt
You loosen the rope
And wipe your tears on your shirt.
You sleep hard that evening
And head off to school that next morning
You’re glad to see that for you, there is no grieving.
All through the day you’re undeniably joyful
With friends all around you seem to find
That you’re no longer depressed or doubtful
While sitting in down in period five
You look around you
Thankful to be alive
Once again after class your teacher pulls you aside
Before he says anything
He notices that you’ve already cried.
“Is there anything you must say or do?”
You’ve got one thing to say
“Thank you.”
~Pichler

2006-09-11T21:35:00.000-05:00

My best friend in the whole entire world has broken up with her boyfriend of almost 11 months. I love her dearly, but sometimes I really do question her judgement and actions. But then again we as a society do that to everyone whether we want to acknowledge that or not. Alex is a friend dear to my heart, but I don't know what he's going to do. He loved her. I mean he really loved her like no one else before. It's hard to explain, but I think my friend just was never in love with him as he was her. Yes I do know more than what I'm saying, but I'm not saying anything else. No I didn't know that she was going to do this. It came as a complete shock to me when I heard it from Alex. I love them both, but this is rather strange and in a way my heart was broken as well.
~Until Then

2006-09-04T17:05:00.000-05:00

Finally, what most of us have been waiting for.

2006-09-02T09:13:00.000-05:00

I quit my job at Panera last night. I was so fed up with doing dishes, all the time. Everytime I would walk into work, I wouldn't even have to check the assignment sheet to see where I was scheduled. If there was a gigantic pile of dishes and trays in the back, then I new that I was on dishes, as normal. I was starting to get fed up with Panera. The entire summer I probably averaged 3 days a week at Panera. Out of the summer, I was on cash reg. 4 times. You do the math, that's an ass load of dishes.The last 3 times I went into Panera were unbearable. I teared up the 1st time when I saw I was on dishes, I was just mildly frusterated, the 2nd time I came in I actually shed a few tears because I was angry, the final time I walked into Panera as an associate, I broke down and became red in the face. After doing a trash run, I sat down outside and cryed for 10 minutes. Not becuase I was sad, because I was overly frusterated and mad at my Boss. I then called my dad and asked if I could resign from my job. He said that I had his approval. I then preceeded to tell my manager. I coudl barely expalin to him why I wanted to quit without crying. He told me why I was never on cash reg. It's because somehow my drawer was always off by a few cents the 4 times I worked cash reg. That furiated me! Why can't you tell me that?!?!?! Then just have me focus a little bit more on what I'm doing. He gave me a paper and then I wrote down why I wanted to quit. "While working for Panera, I have always seemed to find self in Back of House doing the multitude of dishes. People who have worked here longer than me have said themselves that they have never done dishes. When I began working for Panera, they said that they were an Equal Oppourtunity employeer. What I've experienced while working for Panera definantly was not equal oppourunity. If I was doing something wrong while working up front, I would have like to have known about it, not just be shut into the back, sent there only to clean up the mess that you've created. That's not how a company should function."
~Until Then

2006-08-26T10:45:00.000-05:00

Geschwindigkeitsbeschrankung- German for Speed Limit
~Until Then

2006-08-22T10:37:00.000-05:00

Summer Stats!
I've...
..dyed my hair 14 times
..spent 16 hours flying
..spent 57.2 hours road tripping
..consumed 71 bowls of cereal
..spent 25 days on vacation
..purchased 4 new pairs of shoes
..put 2,314 miles on the jeep
..spent 4 hours lost in the woods
..been sick for 17 days combined
..washed 946 dishes at Panera
~Until then

2006-08-22T09:47:00.000-05:00

So it's come down to the last say of summer...
..that's kind of hard to believe. I mean about 96 or so days ago we were just finishing up our last day of sophomore fun, (yea right). We're all going to be juniors next year, and for me it looks to be the hardest year ever. This is where is counts. We pretty much have to start getting on the track of what we want to do with the rest of our lives!! We all rigth now might have some idea that we've been tossing around in our heads, but it's time to start finalizing all of the minor details. I'm looking forward to school, I really am. I love being busy with all of the drama activities. Able to wander back into the auditorium (which is still a cancer threat). I love filling my time with things like that. It's who I am. No, I don't know what next year holds for me, but I do know that I'm going to make the most of it. Doesn't that make sense? I mean I watch those people who have like 4 classes and just breeze through the day! How can one do that? I mean why not accept the free education that we have now and make the most of it, as where in 2 years we/our parents will have to chuck out an arm and a leg just so we can make a future for our selves. That's just stupid for people to pass up so many amazing chances for them to discover what they love. I just don't understand people some times. On a slightly different school note, my boyfriend Nick for those of you who know him, he's going tobe a senior. My best friend Elena is in the same boat with McDevitt. All of us find it rather weird that it's their last year at school. I mean you never really think that you'll make it that far. Think about it in 2nd grade, we still had 10 years of school left. 10 years!! That's a a really long time when you're like 8 or 7. It's weird to think about. I know that when he goes off to college next year, I'll still be able to see him and everything, but I won't be able to see him around school during the day. But it's his last year, I want to make everything perfect for him. Just so he look back and say that he had one hell of an amazing senior year. That's why this summer we hung out a lot. I knew that once next summer hits, it'll be a different story. Another reason why I loved this summer better than any other summer. It went by faster but not too fast. But it's almost over with and we've got less than 24 hours to get all of our summer plans done.
~Until Then

2006-08-18T10:48:00.000-05:00

My friends really need to stop invading my dreams
Last night, or early this morning, whatever you prefer, I had a multitude of dreams. It started out as a nice day where I was headed to the beach with Elena and Theresa. Not too bad, they're some of my good friends so what the hell why not?? Well anyways we were just chilling when this rather large and rather ugly girl comes up to me and we start to exchange insults. Things then progressivly worse from there. Enter Mary, Thomas, Drew, Kyle M., Jordan, and Thane. All of whom are wearing some rather thick teal green coat that goes down to their knees. They were talking to some one who looked rather important, while this chick named El and I began to fight. They dissapeared. Well what dream wouldn't be complete with out a secret lair?? I some how ended uyp in this large dome shaped room and I was now on a mission, all though I can't remember what happened. I next found out what the 6 of my friends were doing. They had signed up to ride underwater in this large blue nylon thing that looks like one of those childrens play tubes, although about 200 ft long. There was a second shorter are protruding from the right to let air out but not let water back in. They were off and they sunk lower into the water. Well somehow I ended up in the tube next to the mean girl who was also on the journey. I broke her nose in some sort of a slow-mo fight scene. She called me a bitch and so forth. Jordan and Thomas showed up and Thomas began to lecture us on how the color purple doesn't really exist and that we should all stop using our opposable thumbs. (somehow those 2 subject went together) Jordan was just standing there and mimed what Thomas would talk about. Needless to say, it didn't work too well. *Pichler wakes up due to annoying beeping from phone and reads text message* Dream part 2. I am no longer at the beach or in the blue tube, I am now on a giant board of Risk. Ever play the game? Neither had I until yesterday when Nick made me play it. Well if you haven't played it, the objective is simple, invade other countries while protecting your own, and try to gain the most. Normally one plays with small plastic soilders but of course my friends and I had replaced these playing pieces with ourselves. Mary, Thomas, Jordan, Thane, Kyle M., Drew, Amanda, Elena, Theresa, Nick, McDevitt, Big Kyle, Marti and Myself, were now on this giant Risk board in the middle of Downtown Chicago near a subway station. After the 1st roll of the die, all hell breaks loose! Thomas, Nick, and Big Kyle start to duke it out over Russia. Elena and Theresa wrestle of Australia. Drew, Thane, and McDevitt fight to the death in Brazil. Mary, Jordan, Kyle M., and Amanda are blowing the brains out of eachother down in South Africa. But Marti and I just stand on Alaska watching everything, people are loosing limbs and sanity. I roll the die again, but this time everything stops, and once again in slow-mo everyone watched as both die bounce down into the hobo-infested subway/sewer system of Chicago. Everyone stares around in horror. We can't play on with out the die. So we split up into 2 teams. Nick, McDevitt, Marti, Amanda, Thane, Thomas, and Jordan on one team. Elena, Mary, Big Kyle, Kyle M, Drew, Theresa, and Myself on another. Jordan whips out an old school style beat box and breaks it down. We all then head down ths stairs after the die. My team hears the beat box as it slowly fades away into the distance after the other die. But then we hear a large beeping sound and it gets lounder and louder before I realize that's my phone and I wake up only to learn that Nick's train is running late. After that I couldn't fall back asleep. Sorry guys. Maybe someone could write a story or a decent ending.
~Until Then

Complicated Days

2006-08-12T11:17:00.000-05:00

On Wednesday I worked at my church's state fair stand for about 10 hours with Nick for volunteer hours. It was so much fun! Talking to all the people that travel from state to state showing their prized bulls and horses. It really shows a bit of a life that few of us here have ever experienced. But one guy in particular really took interest in talking to me. I decided to dye my hair an insane red once again cause I was getting very sick of the blondeish color, well I forgot that my church makes us wear a visor/cap that is about 1 shade away from my hair color. I got a lot of comments on how I dyed my hair to match the state fair cap. Ugh. Not my intention. Oh well. But this guy found it so cool that he deicided to give me the nickname of Big Red. Yes like the gum. But the gum didn't have red hair shooting from the top now did it? Oh well but he was so funny about. He went on that I should make my own crayon color and other random crap. He just really made my long humid day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well the day after the state fair, Nick took me with his parents to go look for a car for him. He ended up getting a 1994 red corsica. I don't like much except for the fact that the car is inside and out some shade of red. Yay!! But if it just gets him around this year, and to school, well then it's a car. He'll get a new one before he goes to college. So he suppost to pick it up sometime today. Well later that night we decided to go make s'mores at Gray's Lake in Des Moines. It's our favorite spot at night. If you ever been down there past sunset, do you know the lights on the bridge? Their different colors and it's just entrancing to look at them as the reflect off the water. Well we brought out bag of coals, s'more sticks, marshmellows, chocolate, grahms, and a lighter. After messing with the grill to get it open we put a hand full of coals in it and try to light it. But the damn lighter took 4 min. just to get a spark out of it. Then the coals woudln't light, so we tryed lighting the bag on fire. Obviously a bag of coals comes in a fire resistant bag. Duh! We then tried to light the coals in the bag see if they would catch. Apparently quick starting coals have an experation date. Who'd a thunk it?? So we decided to eat the smores cold. And of course the humid evening air had practically melted our chocolate. And of course to make matters worse, we chose the one night that an extremly obnoxious guy with an air horn decided to show up drunk with his buddies and he blew the damn thing every 5 minutes. Then surprise surprise, I got sick. What a wonderful day.
~Until Then

2006-08-10T14:13:00.000-05:00

~School Schedule~
EB- U.S. History w/ Broderick
Uhm don't know anything about this teacher so yea...

1st- Alg. 2 Trig B w/ Cooley
Heard that I'll love him, so we'll have to see on that

2nd- Chemistry w/ Christansen
Once again, I don't know anything about this teacher

3rd- A Capella w/ Vanderpool
I love Mrs. Vanderpool. She's a wicked sweet teacher!

4th- Radio I w/ Mikels
Hrmm, I also love Mikels! But I can't take Radio II due to crappy schedule issues
B Lunch According to my schdule

5th- Early Brit Lit w/ Schebel
FREAKIN SWEET ASS TEACHER

6th- Creative Writing w/ Schebel
See previous statement

7th- German II w/ Marasco
Sadly this is her last year, bummer. She's a really nice German teacher.

8th- OFF PERIOD!!!

~Until Then

2006-08-03T14:50:00.000-05:00

(From Left To Right) Top Row: William 26, Ben 25, Dad 54, Me 16 Middle Row: Alicia 11, Emily 29 Monica 7 Bottom Row: Courtney 10, Hunter 8. This is the first time that all 5 of us kids have been in the same place at the same time.

2006-08-03T14:04:00.000-05:00

Well the time has come where all of you are squeezing in your last few hours of enjoyed sleep, hanging with friends until the wee hours of the morning, blasting up the music while your parents aren't home, taking the car without permission to pick up a friend so you can do something illegal again, (I mean come on, who doesn't do something illegal during the summer?), soaking up the last bit of the (unbearable) warmth of the sun. Soon it's back to waking up to the annoying blaring beep of our alarms and groggily walking down to the bathroom so that we can get ready for the day. Grabbing our 20 ton back packs and a quick bite to eat or for some of us a tall express or latte from Starbucks. We'll soon walk back down the halls of the school which we've all come to know and ~~love~~ hate. Sitting through pointless classes so that we can attempt to raise our GPA and get into the college of our choice as we doodle random shit on the sides of our notes and tests trying to pass time. Then going home only to do it all over again for the next 9 months. Prepare for the hardest year of our high school lives. (Okay here's the part where you can throw what ever you're munching on at your computer screens in an attempt to hit me for being insane and posting what no one wants to hear)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In other news, for those of you who ever knew my dad's girl friend Dr. Haver, or more commonly known as Meat Loaf Lady, on account of she smells like overly-ripe meat loaf, well they are no longer together as a couple. Strange isn't it? My dad was with her for almost 6+ years. Since my parents have been divorced, I've just had to accept her as a part of my life. Granted yes I didn't like much and would voice my opinion often, I dealt with her and just stayed out of the way as much as possible when we were around each other. My dad knew I didn't like her, but that didn't stop him from dating her, although it did hinder what we did with her. So some of you might be thinking, "Shouldn't you be happy that they broke up? I mean you hated her!" Point taken, I'm am happyish that she's no longer around, but I'm also a bit sadish. "What? You're weird." She made my dad happy, so he was a lot less stressed when it came to work and teaching. He was happy. So it made me happy. And now that my dad isn't the person he used to be, it's a bit on the depressing side. His work is starting to pile up on him so he calls on me to do some of his paper work to lighten the load. So when he's stressed, I'm stressed. Are you starting to see a pattern? Love is a powerful thing.
I recently went to my older sister's wedding. (Yes I have older siblings from my dad's 1st marriage). My sister was married before to a jerk who treated her like crap and was just a miserable person to be around. I hated him when I stayed with my sister for a few days a couple of summers ago. I'd avoid him as long as possible. But she did have two wonderful kids which I love to death. So not even a year after she was divorced, she met Dave. I don't know much about him, except that he does something with computers. But my dad really likes him and obviously so does my sister. Well the wedding was held upstairs in an old Irish bar, but it was really nice and had that old fashion charm. It was a small wedding with just family and really close friends. Courtney and my new niece Monica were the flower girls and hunter was the ring bearer (sp?). My sister looked absolutely radiant! Her dress was very flattering and she looked happy. I've never seen my sister happy. I didn't recognize her when I ran into her at the hotel earlier. I was so happy for her! Just seeing the two of them together made my day. She was crying a little bit when Dave was saying his vows. I wish them the best of life and hope that each day is better than the last. They deserve each other. Love is a powerful thing.
Now as most of you know by now, I have my own significant other. His name is Nick and I met him at drivers ed last summer. We dated for a little bit in the beginning of last year, but then things went a little bit hay-wire on both our parts so we split and didn't talk for 6 months. Those 6 months damn neared killed me. But then in March we spoke again and started dating. And now I wouldn't go back for anything. We've been through so much together, the good and the bad. I've discovered new things about him and me. Just thinking about him makes me feel better. He's the sweetest guy and would do anything for me, and vice versa. And despite what other say, I love him. I truly, deeply, madly, passionately, and honestly love him. He's the single most amazing and wonderful thing that has ever happened to me. We've been dating for almost 5 months. They've been the most amazing 5 months of my life. Nick brings something out in me, something I can't write in words, something that no one that I've ever known or been with has ever brought out in me. It's the most beautiful thing on Earth. A few times with past boyfriends, I've swapped the ever lasting " I love you." I thought I loved them at that time. But it wasn't real now that I look back at it. I didn't know what love was until a few months ago in May. I was suddenly starting to realize how much I did love Nick. And now I do know what love truly is, but I can't explain it. No one can explain what love is to another person, they have to discover it for themselves. Love is a powerful thing.
~Until Then

Some Photo Love!

2006-07-25T11:38:00.000-05:00

Every Pirate Is Caught Eventually

My Bestest Friend In The Whole World And My Amazingly Faded Hair

Screw Knights In Shining Armour

What Are You Looking At?

Ah The Womders Of The 16 Age Drinking Law

4th Time

2006-07-25T10:37:00.000-05:00

Okay, this is the 4th damn time I've changed my skin and of course as always, something doesn't show up. Whether it be my posts of my links or whatever. I'm a bit tired of changing it a the moment, so I will deal with it most likely when I get back from my sisters wedding. So deal with it.
~Until Then

2006-07-19T18:20:00.000-05:00